50 Secrets Hospitals Don’t Want to Tell You (But Every Patient Should Know)

No one looks forward to a health crisis, but our insights and tips will help you get better medical care, cut hospital bill costs, and get out of the hospital alive.

The post 50 Secrets Hospitals Don’t Want to Tell You (But Every Patient Should Know) appeared first on Reader's Digest.

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Film Stars Don’t Die In Liverpool focuses too much on the end of Gloria Grahame’s career despite the thoughtful acting

THE title of this real-life drama is apt.

It refers to 1950s Hollywood seductress Gloria Grahame, who wanted to spend her final days in Liverpool with her ex-lover Peter Turner but was told the US would be more appropriate.

Film Stars Don't Die In Liverpool has great acting but a so-so script
Film Stars Don’t Die In Liverpool has great acting but a so-so script
Sony Pictures Classics

For me it also applies to the actors that bring a so-so script to life.

A definite revelation is Brit Jamie Bell as Grahame’s toyboy lover from Liverpool.

He displays a sensitive, thoughtful performance, with the always excellent Annette Bening as the ageing actress. But too much of this story focuses on the end of her career.

The film is thoughtful but the story focused too much on the end of Gloria Grahame's career
The film is thoughtful but the story focused too much on the end of Gloria Grahame’s career
Sony Pictures Classics

Film Stars Don’t Die In Liverpool

(15) 105mins

★★★☆☆


 

TV and Showbiz – latest celebrity news, gossip, photos, TV and film reviews | The Sun

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More than 80 million Americans have this deadly disease, and many don’t even know it

Obesity-related diseases are on the rise, including one destined to be the leading cause of liver transplants by 2020.
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We Made The Worst Decisions in ‘Detroit: Become Human’ So You Don’t Have To

Detroit: Become Human is a game all about making choices. Developed by Heavy Rain creators Quantic Dream, this Blade-Runner-esque story tasks players with wrestling with their conscience as they attempt to navigate a strange dystopian future.

With everyone else opting to obediently do the right thing as our android protagonist, however, us kind folk at FANDOM decided to mix things up a bit. Pit against a tense android in a dangerous hostage situation, we thought we’d try and see if we could create the worst possible outcome. Don’t try this at home kids.

You can witness fourteen glorious minutes of Detroit gameplay ( and some truly, truly, terrible decision making) in the video above. Now if you’ll excuse us, we’re going to have to try and drown our sorrows until we can live with our horrific crimes.

The post We Made The Worst Decisions in ‘Detroit: Become Human’ So You Don’t Have To appeared first on Fandom powered by Wikia.

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Why don’t conductors realize subway announcements are impossible to hear?

Dear John: On Oct. 17, I was taking the F train from Brooklyn to Manhattan. Because of work on the tracks that day, the F became the D train, making the same stops. The problem was with the voice on the platform giving people information about the changes. Riders could not make out the information…
Business | New York Post

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See Metallica Lead ‘Don’t Look Back in Anger’ Sing-Along in Manchester

Metallica led Manchester fans in a sing-along to Oasis' "Don't Look Back in Anger" during the band's Saturday night concert at the Manchester Arena, the same venue that hosted the Ariana Grande concert struck by

This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: See Metallica Lead ‘Don’t Look Back in Anger’ Sing-Along in Manchester

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Don’t lose your mind when Daylight Saving Time ends

by

Laura Falin

posted in Life

It’s coming.

You have a week and a half to get ready, but make no mistake. The end of Daylight Saving Time will be here on Sunday, November 5th, and, unless you live in Arizona, life as you know it will change.

I used to love the end of Daylight Saving Time. It meant staying up late Saturday night and getting a blissful extra hour of sleep on Sunday. Not any more. Babies, as it turns out, do not actually care if we turn our clocks back. They still go on waking up at the same time their bodies tell them to, regardless of whether we gain an hour or not.

Actually, this goes on for years — even my older kids still wake up too early and can’t fall back asleep. Which means tired, grumpy kids for at least a week afterward around here.

This year, I’m going to try and plan better. Fortunately, there are some great time-change resources here on the BabyCenter blog. And since you’re reading this with plenty of time before the Big Day, there are even things you can start doing now to help your baby or young child adjust.

1. Gradually move bedtimes and wake-up times.

You can start now. Each night, try moving bedtime back by 10 minutes, and get everyone up 10 minutes later in the morning. You can even try moving your time one night, then staying with that time for a few nights, then move it back a little more until everyone’s adjusted. There’s also no rule that says you have to be on schedule by November 5. If it takes a few more days after that to get settled, move at the pace your child needs.

2. Keep bedtime routines the same.

Routine is going to be key when you’re moving bedtimes for small children and babies. The sense of normalcy while the time changes will be comforting, and sometimes the visual cues you use when getting them ready for bed can help them understand that now it’s time for sleep.

3. Adjust the lighting in their rooms.

At this time of year, it will likely be dark when they go to sleep. But you may want to consider blackout or dark curtains to keep the light out in the morning. Also, if your children are old enough to understand, you may want to try a sleep-training alarm clock. The clock lights up when it’s an acceptable time for them to get up in the morning. There are a few good ones – including this one on Amazon.

daylight saving time

4. Take it easy.

I just prep myself for having cranky kids for a bit. I plan on us laying low. None of us (including this tired mama) will be on our best behavior for the week surrounding a time change, and we’ve done it enough now that we simply plow through until everyone’s adjusted on the other side.

Do you have any tips for helping babies and little kids adjust to a time change?

We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program which allows us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.

Images by iStock

The post Don't lose your mind when Daylight Saving Time ends appeared first on BabyCenter Blog.

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Perfect Gifts for the Perfect baby

Don’t Travel to Hawaii Without These Key Vacation-Ready Pieces

Do you ever find yourself living vicariously through the far-flung tropical destinations bloggers always seem to travel to? While it feels like everyone is traveling halfway around the world to destinations like Bali or the South of France, there’s one place that’s much more accessible to those living in the continental U.S.—Hawaii. Though it’s roughly a six-hour flight from the West Coast, the islands that make up our 50th state feel like a world away. While some of you may call Hawaii your go-to spot for a beach vacation, others among us (myself included) will settle to scroll through these gorgeous images and plan our dream Hawaii wardrobe.

While other beach vacations might have you exploring a local town or being more active, Hawaii is a place where you can hit the beach and maybe go snorkeling. In other words, it’s easy to live in your bikini all day, every day while soaking up the vitamin D. Which is why we’ve put together a seven-piece wardrobe to wear in Hawaii with a lot of inspiration from our favorite blogger’s dream vacations.

Go on to see the seven beach-ready pieces bloggers have proven are perfect for a vacation in Hawaii (or any other tropical destination, for that matter).

The one staple for any kind of tropical getaway is a breezy white dress. This is your hero piece that will be both your beach cover-up and your daytime exploring dress.
You’ll need a linen top to throw on over your swimsuit when you hit the beach. Opt for a slightly oversize one that you can tie at the waist to show off a cool suit.
A sun hat is an obvious necessity. Try a neutral-toned or woven topper to practice safe sun in style. A simple striped tee and white shorts make for an easy, laid-back combo that still looks fresh.
If working on your tan all day is not in your plans, try a one-piece suit (beware of the one-piece tan lines, or else pile on the sunscreen). These options are so cool they might convince you to wear them away from the beach, too.
If Instagram taught us anything, it’s that the basket bag is a summery style staple that you can’t go on vacation without. Grab an Insta-worthy tote, and snap those tropical pics.
For when you’re not just living in a swimsuit, try a maxi dress as a go-to dinner-and-drinks option. Plus, the breezy shape will ease the pain of that inevitable sunburn.
Next up, the picture-perfect Zara items one editor wore on her Bali vacation.

Celebrity Style and Fashion Trend Coverage | http://www.whowhatwear.com

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The Real Reason Female Porn Stars Don’t Shoot with Black Guys

As an active porn star, dating outside the adult industry was difficult. The men I met either resented my sexuality or became enamored with the idea of dating an adult performer. Neither worked out well. I went out on a few dates with a guy that was infatuated with me—only it wasn’t me he wanted; it was my porn star alter ego. Take me to work, let me watch you in action, he’d beg.

Read more at The Daily Beast.

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More News About Cone Mills’ ClosureWe normally don’t publish two…

More News About Cone Mills’ Closure

We normally don’t publish two posts in quick succession about the same topic, but the closure of Cone Mills – the last major selvedge denim manufacturer in the United States – is big news. Over at Sportswear International, there’s more info about the company’s future. An excerpt:

A spokesperson for the company confirmed that before shutting down ITV will deliver all orders it had committed to produce. The company also confirmed that it had to stop business for a series of reasons, including the strong competition from low-cost extra-European manufacturers and high fiscal pressure.

ITV preferred not to comment about what a local newspaper recently published about its future. According to the publication, ITV will stop production by October 2017 and asked the Tribunal to transform its current agreement with creditors (it profited from since 2014) into agreement upon liquidation. This way, if the Tribunal approves the request the company’s plant might be put up for sale and its debts might be paid with the amount earned through that sale.

Less clear seems to be its 90 employees’ future as, according to a new Italian work law reformation, unemployment benefits seem to be no longer available for companies facing difficulties.

[…]

Also ITG (International Textile Group), parent company of Cone Denim, the historical US denim manufacturer, had to take a drastic decision as it announced that after more than 110 years of continuous production, its White Oak mill in Greensboro will cease operations by the end of 2017. “Reasons for the decision were changes in the market demand that have significantly reduced order volume at the facility as customers have transitioned more of their fabric sourcing outside of the U.S,” said a corporate statement that included comments from Kenneth T. Kunberger, President & CEO of Cone Denim and International Textile Group. “Despite tremendous efforts to manage these changes, the plant’s large size provides much more capacity than is needed resulting in higher costs that cannot be supported in a sustainable business going forward.”

You can read the rest here. 

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Don’t buy Hollywood men’s crocodile tears for Weinstein victims

Who’s next? Now that Harvey Weinstein’s reign of sexual terror is over, the answer is, hopefully, several of Hollywood’s most durable, liberal, ostensibly politically correct leading men. Until two days ago, Ben Affleck was mainly perceived as his own worst enemy. Then he issued a statement condemning Weinstein’s behavior. “I am saddened and angry that…
Opinion | New York Post

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20 Things Normal People DON’T notice about your style, but you might think they do

Maybe you don’t want to be normal. That’s fine, but the fact is that the world is full of normal people, and despite what social media and Mr. Rogers tells us, chances are you (and me) aren’t special. Sure, we can dress a bit different (or as we like to call it, “better”) than the pack, but that really doesn’t amount to a hill of beans to the vast majority of those around us. So don’t expect most/anyone to notice the following things about your look, because: 1. Most people aren’t very observant, and 2. Nobody would really care even if they did notice. Have a great day!

  1. The width of your lapels, collar spread, and tie knot complement each other.
  2. You recently switched from medium break to no break on your trousers.
  3. Your sunglasses “fit your face shape.”
  4. The brand of your watch.
  5. You’ve uploaded a new selfie/style shot to social media.
  6. Your leathers match perfectly.
  7. You slightly changed your hair style.
  8. That you’re wearing bluchers with a suit instead of true oxfords.
  9. You’re showing that perfect, 1/2 inch of shirt cuff.
  10. Your shoes just happen to be cordovan, not calfskin.
  11. Your jeans are selvedge.
  12. Your sweater is cashmere.
  13. You’re drinking really fancy bourbon/scotch/a craft cocktail.
  14. Your pants are perfectly tapered below the knee.
  15. You’ve got a little extra bit of shirt hanging out around your waist (the horror).
  16. Your jacket has no shoulder divots.
  17. The sleeve cuff buttons on said divot-less shoulder jacket are functional.
  18. You’re wearing a mechanical or automatic watch, instead of good ol’ quartz.
  19. Your tie is a 7-fold tie.
  20. That you aren’t wearing just any ol’ sneakers, you’re wearing Killshots!

 


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Chris Hemsworth: ‘Don’t make me take my shirt off again’

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This Woman’s Photo Proves Eating Disorders Don’t Always Make You Look “Scary Skinny”

“What you see on the outside doesn’t always translate to what is going on inside.”

Health – Good Housekeeping

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Former Titans GM on Avoiding Colin Kaepernick Hire: ‘Don’t Want This Circus’

Floyd Reese, the general manager of the Tennessee Titans from 1994 until 2006, offered three reasons why he believes the franchise decided to sign Brandon Weeden instead of Colin Kaepernick this week to be their backup quarterback – a move that angered many NFL fans.

The

This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: Former Titans GM on Avoiding Colin Kaepernick Hire: ‘Don’t Want This Circus’

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Millions of Women Suffer From a Disease That Virtually Sucks the Life Out of Them — But Doctors Still Don’t Take It Seriously

But doctors still aren’t taking it seriously.

Health – Good Housekeeping

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Rihanna: ‘Don’t Let Your People Die Like This’

“Don’t let your people die like this” is what Rihanna tweeted to President Donald Trump with a picture of the Daily News cover.

What is Rihanna referring to? The people of Puerto Rico who are crying out and begging for help after hurricane Maria tore through the U. S. territory.

As usual, the President is under fire for his ability to add more flames to a raging fire of anger from the American people.

After Hurricane Maria swept through Puerto Rico all he tweeted and went on about was the NFL and players not standing for the National Anthem. He even went so far as to call them “sons of b******” for the choice to take a knee.

 

When he finally decided to acknowledge the crisis in Puerto Rico all Trump could tweet about was the country’s weak infrastructure and terrible electrical grids.

 

Like many other celebrities, Rihanna is asking the President to do his job and take care of his people. A request that shouldn’t be too hard to answer for a president.

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Watch Exclusive ‘Mark Felt’ Clip: They Don’t Deserve You

Watch Exclusive 'Mark Felt' Clip: They Don't Deserve You

For more than 30 years, the true identity of "Deep Throat," the pseudonym given to a source of valuable information in the Watergate investigation by journalists Bob Woodward and Carl Bernstein, was a carefully guarded secret. Now Mark Felt: The Man Who Brought Down the White House brings the true story to the big screen.

Liam Neeson stars as longtime FBI agent Mark Felt; Diane Lane portrays his supportive wife, Audrey Felt. In our exclusive clip, set in their home late at night,…

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‘I don’t think anybody is going to be disappointed’ – Taron Egerton and the Kingsman: The Golden Circle stars assemble for the world premiere in London

Movie fans have not been short of either comic book adaptations or spy movies in recent times yet when Kingsman: The Secret Service hit cinemas three years ago its sharp script, bags of humour and fizzing energy ignited a passion in audiences.
This Is Local London | Film and TV

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Pro sports teams don’t need investment banks

Speaking of sports, maybe pro sports teams do not need to hire investment banks to get record sale prices for their clubs. In recent weeks, Bruce Sherman and New York Yankees legend Derek Jeter agreed to buy the Miami Marlins baseball team for $ 1.2 billion, a price better than many expected, and Tilman Fertitta agreed…
Business | New York Post

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Most Floridians in Irma’s path don’t have flood insurance

FORT LAUDERDALE, Fla. — As Hurricane Irma bears down on Florida, an Associated Press analysis shows a steep drop in flood insurance across the state, including the areas most endangered by what could be a devastating storm surge. In just five years, the state’s total number of federal flood insurance policies has fallen by 15…
Business | New York Post

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Pelosi Told Trump to Tweet: Don’t ‘Worry,’ DREAMers

House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi asked President Trump on Thursday to tweet that DREAMers should not be worried about being deported in the next six months, a Democratic aide told The Daily Beast. “Pelosi told her colleagues at a whip meeting this morning that she spoke to Trump this morning via phone and asked him to tweet this to make clear DREAMers won’t be subject to deportation in a six-month window,” the aide said, referring to Trump’s decision to end DACA, the Obama-era program that shields DREAMers from deportation. Later Thursday morning, Trump tweeted: “For all of those (DACA) that are concerned about your status during the 6 month period, you have nothing to worry about—No action!”

Read more at The Daily Beast.

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ESPN Analyst Quits: ‘I Just Don’t Think the Game Is Safe for the Brain’

A prominent ESPN college football color commentator resigned because he didn't want a job enabling a sport that creates long-term brain injuries. 

Ed Cunningham, a former NFL player himself, left a six-figure salary and a high-profile gig to do what he thought was right, according to his wide-ranging interview in

This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: ESPN Analyst Quits: ‘I Just Don’t Think the Game Is Safe for the Brain’

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Don’t Give Your Kids Pet Turtles, the CDC Warns

A salmonella outbreak linked to the reptiles has sickened at least 37 people.

Health – Good Housekeeping

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Even Tesla engineers don’t think Autopilot is as good as Musk claims

Tesla Autopilot

Public perception of Tesla’s suite of Autopilot features has undergone a dramatic and remarkable shift in recent months. When Tesla first introduced the feature in October of 2015, Elon Musk was heralded as a modern day Thomas Edison capable of delivering revolutionary products and services that previously existed exclusively in the realm of science fiction. Since then, Musk’s predictions with respect to self-driving cars have only gotten bolder.

Just three months ago, for example, Musk said that the company later this year would demo a Tesla Model S driving itself from New York City all the way to Los Angeles with no driver interaction whatsoever.

Continue reading…

Trending right now:

  1. 9 paid iPhone apps on sale for free right now
  2. T-Mobile customers: Don’t buy a Galaxy Note 8
  3. 10 Netflix movies and shows you should watch before they’re removed in September


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Cramer Remix: Don’t trust this market maneuver during a sell-off

Jim Cramer explains why investors should be wary of stock buybacks during market-wide pullbacks.
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Floyd Mayweather Sr. Says Justin Bieber ‘Don’t Even Know Boxing’

Floyd Mayweather and Justin Bieber have a long and fruitful friendship. They've spent time in Vegas together. They've done 

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5 ways women who don’t have kids can actually be the most nurturing people

5 ways women who don’t have kids can actually be the most nurturing people


5 ways women who don’t have kids can actually be the most nurturing people

It’s becoming, slowly but surely, more acceptable for women to say out loud that they don’t want children. However, that doesn’t mean they aren’t faced with loads of criticism or judgement for their lack of interest in being parents. A common misconception (among so many) about women who don’t want to have children is that they’re frigid or selfish. But actually, women who don’t have kids can be nurturing, too. The way they express that ability just might look a little different from how we’re taught to think it will.

Just because someone doesn’t want children doesn’t meant something’s wrong with them.

What about all the men out there who cringe at the idea of adding a baby to their life? They aren’t less of a person or judged for not wanting to be a dad, right? Maybe it’s because mothers are still assumed to be the primary caregiver and are subsequently loaded with more parenting responsibilities and expectations. And society immediately decides that a woman who chooses not to have kids is incapable of unconditional love for and dedication to another human.

But that’s totally messed up. Actually women without kids are nurturing in some totally different — and also some not-so-different — ways than moms are.

1. They’re amazing friends and babysitters.

A lack of desire to parent a child doesn’t mean that a woman possesses no inclination to nurture, take care of, or be emotionally generous with other human beings. Those things vary as much in childless women as they do in people who have kids (yeah, parents aren’t all saints, guys). In the absence of children to pour those wonderful qualities onto, women who don’t want kids spend their lives bringing those things into their relationships with friends, family members, romantic partners, and likely also kids who aren’t their own.

Also, um, most women who don’t want kids don’t “hate” children or judge a person for becoming a parent. In fact, all the work they see parents doing is a part of what convinces a lot of women that motherhood is not the right life choice for them. But hey, they’ll often be happy to babysit, listen to a parent’s stresses (even if they can’t totally relate), and generally support the parents of the world.

2. They were honest with themselves.


People who don’t want children know themselves. They know that they don’t want to take care of a kid or raise another person. That’s saving those would-be kids from a lot of hurt and probable therapy. Just because women are capable of having kids doesn’t mean they want or have to be. Better for all kids to leave parenting to those who enjoy it.

3. They make great mentors.


Clearly, women who are parents can obviously also mentor you at work and be badasses in the workplace. But a woman without children is likely to have a little extra energy to spare and possibly devote to younger people in their field. The fact is, being a mom isn’t the only way for women to invest in helping younger people thrive and succeed. Also, being mentored by a woman is highly recommended.

4. They give what time and resources they can to help others.

Again, women who have kids can and definitely do volunteer and donate their time and money to charitable causes. But women without children — because duh, they don’t have kids — are more likely to have a little extra in the “time and money” department, which helps when trying to do good in the world and help others.

Look at Chelsea Handler, a super successful woman who never wants to have kids. She donates tons of money to charities and travels all the time to learn about the world and spread the word. The nicest woman in the world, Ellen Degeneres, has been adamant about not having kids, too. “I don’t want to have one. I don’t want to have six. I don’t want to have any. They’re precious to look at and I love them…  [But I] don’t want ’em.” Sure, these two women are hella rich, but they’re also clearly not the selfish, heartless subhumans that women who don’t want kids are often made out to be.

5. They take care of Mother Nature.


Sorry, parents, but if you’re judging women for not wanting to experience the joy they never knew they were missing, you might want to take a long hard look in the mirror. Having children is terrible for the environment. Really, you can reduce your carbon footprint by 58 tonnes a year just by not procreating. When it comes to climate change, having kids is like having a private jet.

Whether a woman decides to have kids or no doesn’t make a certain “type” of person, and it definitely doesn’t mean she doesn’t know how to nurture others. Just like there are a ton of reasons for having kids, there are just as many reasons not to have them.



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Trump could have said the racists don’t represent him or his agenda. He didn’t.

Days after bloody demonstrations in Charlottesville, Virginia, that left a counterprotester dead, President Donald Trump denounced the Ku Klux Klan and neo-Nazis by name, calling those and other hate groups “repugnant to all that we hold dear as Americans.”


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“You Don’t Get To Tell Me To Shut Up On Nat’l TV” Symone Sanders Checks Former Attorney General For Disrespecting Her

Thankfully, she didn’t take this lying down.

The post “You Don’t Get To Tell Me To Shut Up On Nat’l TV” Symone Sanders Checks Former Attorney General For Disrespecting Her appeared first on MadameNoire.

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The Truth You Don’t Want to Hear About Going on a Diet

If you find yourself gaining weight every time you try to cut back on food, you’re going to want to read this.

Health – Good Housekeeping

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Tyson’s solar eclipse tip: Don’t video it, experience it

NEW YORK (AP) — Prominent astrophysicist Neil deGrasse Tyson has a suggestion for anyone with a view of next week’s solar eclipse: Put down your smartphone and take in the phenomenon yourself.
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Consumer Reports: We don’t recommend these Microsoft products anymore

We want our electronics to be quick and reliable, right? Well, Consumer Reports has stopped recommending Microsoft Surface laptops and tablets for not being up to snuff.

Microsoft Surface products deemed unreliable

CR collects vast amounts of data on products we use everyday. They test products in their own lab and survey their subscribers for information on reliability in real-life use.

They say that if the Surface tablets or laptops were being scored by their lab testing alone, it would be a different story. The Surface products perform well on “display quality, battery life, speed, and ergonomics,” according to the group.

The problems with the Surface Pro reported to CR by users included trouble starting up, unexpected shut down, device freezing and lagging screen response.

Read more: 6 electronics items you should never buy at Costco

The Consumer Reports brand reliability report on the Surface Pro tablet says “these conclusions are based on our breakage rate estimates for tablets by the end of the 2nd year of ownership, gathered from subscribers’ experiences with 50,826 tablets purchased new between 2014 and the first quarter of 2017.”

Microsoft responded to the report with a blog post, saying “while we respect Consumer Reports, we disagree with their findings…using metrics that include failure and return rates – both our predicted 1-2-year failure and actual return rates for Surface Pro 4 and Surface Book are significantly lower than 25%.”

The post goes on to say “we stand firmly behind the quality and reliability of the Surface family of devices, and I can confidently tell you there has never been a better time to buy a Surface.”

Watch: If you bought electronics between 2000-2011 you may be owed money!

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Love Don’t Live Here Anymore

african american couple conflict

“Sometimes we have to let go of what is killing us, even if it’s killing us to let go.” – Unknown

It’s hard to accept that the one who you planned to love forever is no longer the one that you will love forever. No one wants to feel like a failure, and when it comes to matters of the heart, it is very easy to. In order to let go, some folks have to feel like they’ve given their all, even if their partner refuses to do so and often, the one who went above and beyond is left piecing together the memoirs of a broken heart.

But life is more than short and we have examples in the form of death, pain, destruction, age and most importantly, authentic love to remind us of such a reality. For those of you who know your relationship is over, free yourself. For those who may still be unsure, read on.

1) Everything is a competition. 

What started out as building a future together is now a rivalry. You no longer feel supported in your endeavors and your mate is far from being your biggest fan. Whenever your significant other places their ego above your happiness, love has taken not just a backseat, but has exited the vehicle. When you truly love someone, you acknowledge their need for recognition. The last thing you do is attempt to steal the shine.

2) “In love” is foreign in your relationship. 

What is being in love? That’s what you’ve been asking yourself repeatedly as of late. Yes, love evolves and changes over time in a relationship, but being in love? That’s an ingredient to your concoction that makes your relationship tastes good. If it’s missing, throw the whole spread away.

3) You no longer hold each other at night. 

The saying, “never go to bed angry” exist for a reason, and while you will have a fight or several, never allow your emotions to dictate how you treat your mate. Harboring negative feelings can enhance resentment towards your mate and widen the gap of intimacy. When you truly love someone, the last thing you want to do is allow anger to manifest within your being. If you are able to count the times that you feel like you’re sleeping next to your roommate vs. your lover, then love may not live here anymore. True love prioritizes intimacy and connections on all levels despite being annoyed.

4) There’s no urgency to make up. 

There’s a difference between taking space to cool off and process following an argument and just having a “f*ck it” type of attitude. When you truly love someone, there’s a sense of urgency and humility that is present when seeking to reconcile. Anger is pushed to the side and understanding your mate’s feelings become a priority.

Love isn’t easy. There will be ups and downs and many times, you may feel like you need to walk away. If you do, that’s okay. It doesn’t make you a failure. It makes you someone who knows that both you and your former mate deserve a partner who you have an authentic, pure connection with that allows you to vibrate higher. Your mate should enhance your existence, not deplete or drain it.

Shantell E. Jamison is a senior editor for EBONY. She moderates various events centered on love, relationships, politics and wellness and has appeared on panels throughout the country. Her book, “Drive Yourself in the Right Direction” is available now. Keep up with Shantell via her website, Facebook, Twitter @Shantell_em and Instagram @Shantell_em.

The post Love Don’t Live Here Anymore appeared first on EBONY.

EBONY

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Make the Marlins a winner? Don’t ever doubt Derek Jeter

Derek Jeter won the auction for the Miami Marlins, but you already knew that. In fact, the moment you heard Jeter was involved in a group pursuing the purchase of the Marlins, you probably figured muscle memory would rule the day and that No. 2 would finish No. 1. Jeter wins. It’s what he does — in baseball, in business, in life, in love. How many people on the face of the earth are better at something than Derek Jeter is at winning? Jeter is part of a group of investors headed by New York venture capitalist Bruce Sherman that is finalizing an agreement to buy the Marlins for $ 1.2 billion. The deal is likely to be announced within the next few days. Of course, this surprises absolutely nobody. Derek Jeter told his grade school teachers he would become a big league ballplayer, and those teachers told his parents their son needed more realistic goals. Jeter became a big league ballplayer. Derek Jeter told his youth…
ABC News: Sports

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Sexual appeals in ads don’t sell brands, products

Ads with sexual appeals are more likely to be remembered but don’t sell the brand or product, according to a meta-analysis of nearly 80 advertising studies. Researchers found no positive effect on study participants’ ability to remember the brands featured in such ads or on their intention to buy the product.
Consumer Behavior News — ScienceDaily

PARENTAL UPDATE:

Amazon explores ready-to-eat meals that don’t need a refrigerator

Amazon is exploring a technology first developed for the US military to produce tasty prepared meals that do not need refrigeration, as it looks for new ways to muscle into the $ 700 billion US grocery business. The world’s biggest online retailer has discussed selling ready-to-eat dishes such as beef stew and a vegetable frittata as…
Business | New York Post

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Better than a boycott: the best answer to ‘I don’t serve cops’

At least something good is coming out of that Dunkin’ Donuts flap. It all started Sunday when a clerk at one of the chain’s shops reportedly turned away two NYPD officers, saying, “I don’t serve cops.” The head of the detectives union declared a boycott until Dunkin’ issues a real apology, while the store manager…
Opinion | New York Post

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J. Crew 30% Off Sale, No ExclusionsWe don’t post that many J….

J. Crew 30% Off Sale, No Exclusions

We don’t post that many J. Crew sales here because … well, they’re literally always having a sale. But this one is special. Take 30% off anything (literally anything) with the checkout code STF03M3. 

As far as we can tell, the code doesn’t have any exclusions, which means you can use it on any of their third-party items. That includes everything from Alden shoes to Drake’s accessories to Barbour jackets to niche Japanese casualwear. For some reason, not all the items show up when you filter for brands in J. Crew’s “In Good Company” section, so browse around and do manual searches for the stuff you like. 

If you’re looking value, check out J. Crew’s higher-end Wallace & Barnes line. The stuff is made better than the company’s mainline products (better fabrics, nicer detailing). 

These sorts of codes pop up once in a blue moon. And if history is any indication, they can stop working unexpectedly. Worth taking a browse while you still can. Also, for lower priced items, you can use the codes STF03M5, STF03M6, and STF03M4. They’ll knock off a flat $ 25. 

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‘I thought American movies exaggerated sorority houses – but after a year in Delta Zeta, I can tell you they don’t’

‘When I joined my sorority, I had to wear a white dress and swear on the Bible in front of 30 other girls’

sorority

Words by Phoebe Morgan, author of The Doll House (out September 14)

Rather than hopping off a plane at LAX, my arrival to America from North London was a little less glamorous. I landed at Willard Airport, a tiny place in the Mid-West, and took a cab to the University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaign, my home for the next year.

U of I is a fantastic university, right in the heart of the Midwestern cornfields. The campus is beautiful, with a bright green quad surrounded by statuesque buildings, a seemingly endless supply of Mountain Dew and of course, one of the largest Greek systems in the USA.

sorority

I knew what a sorority house was – I’d seen Legally Blonde – but I’d always thought American movies exaggerated everything. After a year in Delta Zeta, I can tell you that they didn’t.

Joining a sorority was not easy. ‘Rush’ is the sorority recruitment process, and it’s exhausting. There are 36 sororities at U of I, and you go to them all, followed by three rounds of interviews where the girls judge you on your small talk and clothing, and only invite you back if they like you. Finally, there’s ‘bid day’ where you find out if your top house wants you. Everyone goes to the university quad and rips open an envelope with an invitation in. I saw girls running towards their new sisters screaming, and girls with their heads in their hands because they’d been rejected. A friend told me that the existing sorority members weren’t allowed to leave the house during rush – frat boys would guard the doors to make sure of it.

I was selected by my first choice, Delta Zeta, where I met some lovely girls who remain close friends today. But living in the DZ house took some getting used to. One of the strangest things about being in a sorority is sharing a mansion with 30 other girls, and sharing bunk beds with a stranger. No boys are allowed past 2am, and you get to hear everyone’s gossip. We all knew who the drunkest girl in the house was, who’d slept with the most frat boys, and which DZ girl had originally wanted to be a TriDelt. Because that’s the other thing – not everyone gets their first choice of sorority.

The houses are informally ranked into a tier system: you have the top tier houses, which are known unofficially as the ones with the prettiest, most popular girls, the middle tier houses, and then the bottom tier houses. This is one of the nastier aspects of the Greek system – it was well known which were the unpopular houses, and there was even a horrible website which would name and shame what the students thought of as the ‘ugliest’ sororities, as well as spreading gossip about individuals. I once found out that the guy I was seeing was also seeing someone else through that website – fun for all involved!

While I was there, I was actually seeing an English guy for a bit who was also in a fraternity, but you were allowed to date whoever you wanted. I ended up dating a couple of people (not at the same time) and it was all very campus based because we all went to the same street of bars nearly every night. I didn’t do any online dating – I don’t think it had become big yet. Most of my friends were dating fraternity boys or boys they knew from class. Lots of them would have gone to the same high school and then kept the same boyfriend through college.

sorority

Initiation was another odd night. When I joined DZ, I had to remove all my make-up and jewellery, wear a white dress and swear on the Bible (I’m not religious) in front of 30 other girls, with candles burning all around us. It felt almost cult-like. On another night, all the new recruits were led into a pitch black room, made to line up against the wall and shouted at by one of the sorority committee. Now, I don’t scare easily, but I was honestly terrified. On campus, rumours were rife about hazing – which is illegal. One girl I knew was made to sit on top of a washing machine, while her sisters circled the places on her body where her ‘fat’ jiggled. A fraternity boy was made to drink himself to death in front of his brothers. Another guy was made to run through a field in the dark, with fraternity brothers grabbing him by the legs to try to trip him. Coming from Leeds University, it all seemed bizarre.

sorority

The actual house was beautiful – they all were. It had a huge sweeping staircase (good for Instagram photos with our hands on our hips), a big dining hall with free bagels, and there was always someone around for a chat. We often all had dinner together, studied together, then went out to barn dances, mixers or the bars together.

The whole thing felt like a whirlwind of weirdness; there was always someone dragging you out of bed to go bake cupcakes for a fundraiser, or someone who was crying in the hallway having been hospitalised through drinking the night before. One thing’s for sure – it was never dull.

And frat parties? They were almost exactly how they’re depicted in films! The houses were mansions, there were red cups, beer pong games and people everywhere, spilling out into the gardens where you’d usually find people making out and/or vomiting into bushes. They’d usually go on all night and occasionally be shut down by police. Sometimes they would be themed so everyone would come in fancy dress. We went to several a week when we first joined the university and you always knew which would be the best ones, run by the “most popular” fraternities. I stayed over a few times but boys weren’t allowed to stay at sororities.

I’d say frat culture is similar to how it’s reported although of course the media takes the absolute worst cases and magnifies them – I didn’t hear of any rape cases to my knowledge. A lot of frat boys were absolutely lovely guys, but there was definitely a pack mentality and I think boys felt the pressure to be part of a cool house because it meant they’d get to have socials with the popular sororities, so your frat house was definitely linked to your social status.

I’m still very good friends with a couple of my sorority sisters and I spoke to them about this piece. We all agreed that some of the things that went on now seem ridiculous! I do think after college, most people end up getting jobs in the city (Chicago, in this case) and yes, growing out of the sorority culture.

Three of them are now married or engaged too. I know a few really strong friendship groups that have come from sororities – that said, I know a couple of girls who had a hard time in the Greek system and are very against it to this day. They remember the bitchiness of other girls and that’s something that stays with them – a bit like a bad high school experience that carries on into four years of college.

I do think the culture is a sheep mentality situation – you perhaps don’t question it as much if you’re from the US but as an outsider I did find it very strange. Looking back my American friends agree with me, but at the time, the Greek system is just such a huge part of the college experience and students have often heard all about it from their parents or grandparents, so it’s really more like an institution. Everybody goes along with the crowd and those who didn’t join a sorority were definitely subjected to a few raised eyebrows.

Despite the strangeness of it all, I made some amazing friends in my sorority. I’ve flown back for two of their weddings, we’ve been on a trip to France together, and they saw me through some difficult times when I was in the US. Sororities have their problems, but I was lucky enough to meet some wonderful girls, and for that I’m very grateful.

The post ‘I thought American movies exaggerated sorority houses – but after a year in Delta Zeta, I can tell you they don’t’ appeared first on Marie Claire.

Marie Claire

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Josh Rosen ponders Alabama’s success if SAT requirement raised, says ‘football and school don’t go together’

UCLA quarterback Josh Rosen discussed the academic challenges involved with being a college football player in a wide-ranging interview with Bleacher Report, saying "football and school don’t go together" and suggesting that Alabama would not be as successful if the Crimson Tide were to raise the SAT requirement. Rosen, who has been outspoken on the issue of amateurism in college sports, told Bleacher Report that "human beings don’t belong in school with our schedules." When asked about the inherent conflict of being a college student and a football player, Rosen referred to Alabama, which won four of the past eight national championships. "Look, football and school don’t go together," Rosen said. "They just don’t. Trying to do both is like trying to do two full-time jobs. There are guys who have no business being in school, but they’re here because this is the path to the NFL. There’s no other way. "Then there’s…
ABC News: Sports

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Don’t hold your breath for any fun new iPhone 8 colors

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If you’re planning to buy a colorful new iPhone later this year, you should probably temper your excitement: You might have fewer options to choose from than you were expecting.  

The next-gen iPhones will likely launch in only three hues, according to reliable Apple insider Ming-Chi Kuo. His latest research note, which was provided to MacRumors, predicts that Apple will release only black, silver, and gold versions of both the deluxe iPhone 8 and its companion 7S and 7S Plus devices.   

The trio of shades just showed up in an earlier leak, which caught the blogosphere’s attention because of the new gold hue. Many guessed this to be a new “copper gold” or bronze color joining the current lineup of black, jet black, gold, rose gold, silver, and red. Instead, if Kuo’s information is correct, Apple is going back to basics and cutting out the other options completely. Read more…

More about Apple, Smartphones, Gold, Colors, and Rumors


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“Design-wise, I don’t have any boundaries when it comes to…

“Design-wise, I don’t have any boundaries when it comes to gender. My friends wear bras—and they’re men. Men’s wear is not glamorous, and women’s wear is, so why not mix the two together? When men wear my clothes, they say, ‘I can rock a dress and still feel handsome.’ Once you get that vibe going, the style just falls into place naturally.” Shayne Oliver opens up.

Photo by Inez and Vinoodh, styled by Edward Enninful.

W Magazine

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The season’s best summer party shoes don’t skimp on groove or…

The season’s best summer party shoes don’t skimp on groove or glamour. Follow along as models Laura Love, Grace Hartzel, and Grace Elizabeth shimmy and shake with every step clad in some of the most foot-tapping accessories to ever make their way out onto the dance floor. From bejeweled Dolce & Gabbana pumps to feathered Roger Vivier sandals, here are 7 of the most stylish ways to dive into party shoe season.

Read the full story.

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The Webster FW 16

The Sneaky Things House Flippers Don’t Want You to Know

That house may look good on the surface, but don’t be fooled.

Home Ideas – Good Housekeeping

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Don’t lose sleep over sharing your bed with your pet or kids

About half of all pet owners share their beds or bedrooms with their pets. Studies about co-sleeping are limited to the bedtime arrangements of adults, or parents and their children. Researchers say that society regards both human-animal and adult-child co-sleeping with apprehension. These concerns should be set aside because both practices have their benefits, says the lead author of a new study.
Parenting News — ScienceDaily

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De Blasio’s school-safety numbers don’t add up

Mayor de Blasio on Tuesday declared the last school year to be the safest on record — conveniently skipping over the fact that that’s only according to his records. NYPD school-safety chief Brian Conroy began giving away the show when he noted that city stats don’t include incidents that schools handle internally, without calling in…
Opinion | New York Post

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Jurors don’t reach verdict, ask first questions in ‘Pharma Bro’ case

Nearly 16 hours in, and jurors have​ ​yet to return a verdict in the federal case of notorious “pharma bro” Martin Shkreli. The panel deliberated just over eight hours Tuesday before calling it quits. They sent out their first note mid-afternoon, asking Brooklyn federal ​Ju​dge Kiyo Matsumoto three questions regarding “assets under management” and “fraudulent…
Business | New York Post

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Watch Maren Morris Own the Stage in Live ‘Drunk Girls Don’t Cry’ Video

Maren Morris made her first run of shows as a headlining artist earlier this year, and the Grammy winner is commemorating her first leg of the Hero Tour with a live music video for her song "Drunk Girls Don't Cry."

The video uses a live recording of "Drunk Girls Don't Cry," a fan favorite that the Texas native featured as the second song on her set lists during the tour that ran from

This article originally appeared on www.rollingstone.com: Watch Maren Morris Own the Stage in Live ‘Drunk Girls Don’t Cry’ Video

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Americans don’t need elite tastes to join the upper class

Is what ails America’s struggling middle class a kale chasm? A breast-feeding barrier? A Pilates pitfall? Is having a grasp of these things required to be a full member of the New Upper Class? It’s becoming a common view that the taste codes of the cultural elite are making it harder for those beneath them…
Opinion | New York Post

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Don’t cheer Mandy Patinkin leaving ‘Great Comet’ just yet

The actors and activists appalled that Mandy Patinkin was going to replace a black actor in the Broadway musical “Natasha, Pierre & the Great Comet of 1812” scored a victory on Friday when Patinkin, reluctant to step into a minefield of racial politics, withdrew from the production. But that victory may turn out to be…
Entertainment | New York Post

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A Pro Tip to the President: Don’t Insult a Woman’s Face

Is this the lowest of lows yet?

Lifestyle – Esquire

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Don’t Let Your Sweaty Feet Make Your Shoes Smell

Here’s how to stop it before it starts.

Style – Esquire

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Paris Hilton Went Brunette, And We Don’t Even Know What To Think

When Paris Hilton isn’t blonde, it feels like our “Simple Life” has been turned upside down. 

The 36-year-old reality star debuted her new brunette locks a few days ago in an Instagram that left her fans reeling. It’s unclear if she dyed her hair, or if Hilton is fooling all of us with a very convincing wig. 

A post shared by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on

Hilton’s followers mostly reacted positively to her new hair. 

“You look amazing as a brunette. I am glad you decided to try the dark side,” one commenter wrote. Another added, “I love the brunette on you!!!” 

A post shared by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on

A post shared by Paris Hilton (@parishilton) on

When Paris first got a glance of herself in the mirror, we predict she said something along the lines of: 

If she needs help going back to blonde, Kim Kardashian’s stylist gave HuffPost some great tips

HuffPost has reached out to confirm if Hilton dyed her hair. 

The HuffPost Lifestyle newsletter will make you happier and healthier, one email at a time. Sign up here.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Style – The Huffington Post
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Please Don’t Get Mauled by a Bear This Weekend

But if you do, be sure to film it. And survive.

Lifestyle – Esquire

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The Bro Romper Exists and I Don’t Want to Live on This Planet Anymore

RompHim wants to be the next big thing in menswear.

Style – Esquire

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Orlando Bloom Says He Is Still Friends with Ex Katy Perry: Breakups ‘Don’t Have to Be About Hate’

Orlando Bloom has nothing but love for his ex Katy Perry.

The actor opened up about his split from the 32-year-old singer in the May issue of ELLE UK, saying the two have managed to stay friends.

“We’re friends, it’s good,” he said in the issue, on sale April 13. “We’re all grown up. She happens to be someone who is very visible, but I don’t think anybody cares about what I’m up to. Nor should they. It’s between us. It’s better to set an example for kids and show that [breakups] don’t have to be about hate.”

Perry expressed similar sentiments following the end of their yearlong relationship, urging fans not to pit the two against each another.

“HOW BOUT A NEW WAY OF THINKING FOR 2017!?” she tweeted. “U can still b friends & love ur former partners! No one’s a victim or a villain, get a life y’all!”

This wasn’t Bloom’s first time navigating a peaceful breakup while living in the public eye. The actor remains on good terms with his ex-wife Miranda Kerr, with whom he shares 6-year-old son Flynn.

From Coinage: See Where 6 Stars Were Before They Were Famous

 

“With Miranda, there was a sense that I don’t want my son to go back through the Internet where people made up lies,” he said. “Miranda and I have a remarkable relationship. We coparent really well.” 

During the interview, Bloom also addressed the now infamous photos of himself paddleboarding naked while on vacation in August, admitting that his typically keen eye for photographers let him down.

“It was extremely surprising, I wouldn’t have put myself in that position if I’d thought it would happen,” he said. “I’ve been photographed a million times in a million different ways. I have a good radar. We’d been completely alone for five days. Nothing around us. There was no way anyone could get anything. So I had a moment of feeling free …What can I tell you? Note to self: you’re never free. Ha!”


PEOPLE.com

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Don’t Bother Girls, and Other Life Advice from Bill O’Reilly’s New Book

How bout that.

Lifestyle – Esquire

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What Do You Do If You Don’t Have Career Dreams?

Besides running away to a cabin in the woods.

Lifestyle – Esquire

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No, You Don’t Need ‘Vagina Lipstick’

It seems plucked right off the pages of Gwyneth Paltrow’s diary, but VMagic Feminine Lips Stick is a real and unnecessary product that promises to keep your vulva “balanced, moisturized and purified.” 

Yes, people. We’re talking about “lipstick for your vagina,” as it’s been dubiously termed. 

The product is really more like a chapstick ― “Because your other lips get chapped, too!” is an actual tagline ― and it’s made with organic avocado oil and honey. It claims to treat things like itch and discomfort, skin dryness, “odor causing bacteria” and ingrown hairs.

This puts “vagina lipstick” in the pantheon of insane and unnecessary health products marketed to prey on women’s insecurities about their own bodies. It’s on par with vaginal facials and insertable jade eggs, both of those were deemed questionable by medical professionals. And acccording to Dr. Maria Isabel Rodriguez, an assistant professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Oregon Health and Science University, you really shouldn’t use this, either. 

“At first glance, the idea of vulvar lipstick sounds like a joke, or another harmless beauty product,” Rodriguez told The Huffington Post, but she listed a few very real reasons it may not be harmless at all. 

Despite the fact that the balm boasts a natural bill of ingredients, Rodriguez pointed out “vulvar skin is very sensitive, and generally does best without any special soaps or shampoos.”

“If symptoms are so bothersome that women need treatment, they should absolutely discuss this with their gynecologist,” she said. Issues like itching or pain or symptoms from vaginal atrophy should be handled by professionals, she added, not vulvar lipstick. It worries her that women may use Lips Stick to treat symptoms, she said.

“While symptoms may be caused by yeast or hormonal changes, it is essential they be evaluated to rule out any chronic skin conditions like lichen sclerosus [patches of thin, white skin] or even vulvar cancer,” she said. 

Both Rodriguez and the VMagic website point out that the balm is for external use only.

“The lipstick should never be used internally,” Rodriguez said. “That could cause a change in pH, vaginal infections and all kinds of misery. It concerns me that products like these perpetuate the idea that there is something inherently wrong with women’s reproductive organs ― that they need a balm, a shampoo or perfume.”

Unless you’re dealing with an actual medical condition, your genitals are self-sufficient as they are. The vagina is virtually self-cleaning, it’s supposed to smell, and symptoms like itching, discomfort and unusual odors can be signs of a health issue that needs professional attention. Although the balm can also be used for things like chafing, rash and ingrown hairs, Rodriguez said those can be remedied by using a warm compresses and gentle exfoliation and not picking at your skin. 

For now, please keep your love of lipstick on your face, thank-you-very-much. 

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— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Style – The Huffington Post
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Whatever You Do, Don’t Ask Anna Kendrick To Be A Bridesmaid

Sure, she’s been in a couple wedding movies, but Anna Kendrick does not want to be in an actual wedding. Especially not as a bridesmaid. 

During an appearance on “Late Night with Seth Meyers,” the “Table 19” actress explained why she’d rather not stand beside the bride on the big day.

“I try not to get invited to weddings,” Kendrick said. “It’s like watching your friends put on a little pageant. And you have to be in a nice dress and talk to people you don’t know. I feel like I’ve potentially avoided making very close female friends cause I don’t want to be a bridesmaid.” 

She added, “If you put me on an email chain and tell me I have to wear ballet pink nail polish, I will kill you where you stand… Like, I can be friends with you if you’re already married.” 

Check out Seth’s hilarious reaction to her tale in the video above. 

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Sorry, You Don’t Actually Have A Year To Send A Wedding Gift

You may have heard somewhere that guests have up to a year after the wedding to send a gift to the newlywed couple. 

These days, though, etiquette experts insist that a year is way, way too long to wait.

“A year is a long time and a lot can change!” Amber Harrison of Wedding Paper Divas told The Huffington Post. “For example, it is totally possible that the couple might be making a big cross-country move or welcoming a new baby one year after the wedding, in which case receiving a wedding gift might feel out of place.”

So how long is the window, really?

“Guidance for proper timing of the gift is not as clear cut,” Harrison added. “Gifts are welcome and appropriate at any time before the wedding and even at the reception. It is perfectly fine for gifts to also arrive after the wedding, but it should be soon enough that the wedding is still top of mind. There are always exceptions to the rule, but sending a gift more than a month or two after the wedding is probably too long.”

There you have it. 

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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15 Cards For People Who Don’t Give A Damn About Valentine’s Day

Valentine’s Day is for lovers ― but who says singles can’t have a little fun with it, too? 

Below, 15 anti-valentines to send to your favorite love hater come February 14.

The HuffPost Lifestyle newsletter will make you happier and healthier, one email at a time. Sign up here.

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What Sex Therapists Tell People Whose Partners Don’t Want Sex

Being in a relationship with someone who’s disinterested in sex can feel incredibly lonely. A discrepancy in desire is more common than most people realize, though. 

What’s the best way to address it with your spouse? Below, sex therapists share the advice they give people with higher sex drives than their partners.

1. Be honest with your spouse about your needs.

Don’t shut your partner out and quietly suffer through your sexual frustration. The first step you should take to improve your sex life is to tell your S.O. that you wish you were intimate more frequently, said Keeley Rankin, a sex therapist in San Francisco, California. 

“See how your spouse responds,” she said. “Listen to what they say, feel and say they want. You never know, they may want more closeness as well.”

2. Discuss the things that make sex possible and the barriers in the way.

Without asking, there’s no way of knowing why your spouse is disinterested in sex. Maybe they’re just exhausted and too stressed out by the day’s end to initiate sex. Or if they’re experiencing sexual dysfunction of some kind (premature ejaculationerectile dysfunction or a lack of vaginal lubrication, for instance), it makes sense that they’re apprehensive about initiating sex. 

“You have to consider the life, emotional and physical barriers that can affect sex and shift libidos,” said Elizabeth McGrath, a sex therapist and educator who works in the Bay Area. “If your spouse has been caring for others all day, for instance, they might not feel ready for sex until they’ve had a moment to themselves to feel nourished and decompress.”

Once you’ve pinpointed some potential causes, figure out a workaround as a team; schedule a doctor’s appointment if there’s a physical barrier to sex, or give your spouse some totally kid-free “me time” if exhaustion is the problem.

3. Try seduction, not criticism or pressure. 

A slight mismatch in libido can easily become a larger one if the lower-desire spouse is badgered about the issue, said Danielle Harel, a sex therapist and the co-author of Making Love Real: The Intelligent Couple’s Guide to Lasting Intimacy and Passion

The mismatch often creates a cycle where the spouse with the higher sex drive complains, compares or criticizes their partner and the partner ends up having sex out of obligation, she explained. 

Instead of pressuring your spouse, “see if you can find out what turns them on the most and try seduction,” Harel said. “Try saying (and really meaning), ‘It’s fine if we don’t have sex tonight but would you be willing to just open up to see if you start to get turned on?’”

She added: “Just because you start, doesn’t mean you have to go all the way. Make sure you have this agreement with your partner.”

4. Take turns initiating intimacy. 

If you’re locked into a cycle of initiation and rejection, ask your spouse if they’d be willing to initiate some form of intimacy every few days, said Moushumi Ghose, a sex therapist and author of Classic Sex Positions Reinvented. 

“Take turns each day initiating some kind of touch, even if if the goal isn’t orgasm, but just non-goal oriented sexy time,” she said. “The next day, the other person initiates. This can help balance out the playing field.” 

5. See if your spouse is willing to make out. 

Reconnecting sexually is all about taking slow, measured steps. If your partner is willing to have a hot make-out session or just touch, be open to that, said Celeste Hirschman, a sex therapist and the co-author of Making Love Real: The Intelligent Couple’s Guide to Lasting Intimacy and Passion.

“Oftentimes, when people are asking for sex, a lot of what they want is just enthusiastic, loving connection.” Hirschman said. “Just remember: You both have to be enthusiastic about it; it won’t be fulfilling if your partner just gives you sex without being present or enjoying the experience themselves.” 

6. Get outside help. 

Instead of dwelling on what’s missing in the relationship, consider the bond and attraction that still exists and build on that, McGrath said.

“Explore workshops, sex education resources and sex therapy that can expand your sexual horizons,” she said. “Look at what is possible and continue to talk about what else you can do together as a team.”

7. Keep bringing your sexual energy, but in a loving, calm way.

Don’t lose heart if you’re the higher-desire partner, said Ian Kerner, a sex therapist and New York Times-bestselling author of She Comes First: The Thinking Man’s Guide to Pleasuring a Woman.

“Higher-desire partners often get frustrated and feel rejected, creating a sexual disposition that is impatient and brittle and temperamental,” he said. “This often worsens the dynamic around sex and sometimes the higher-desire partner may opt out altogether, which is equally bad.”

The best thing you can do, according to Kerner, is to “stay in it to win it. That means nurturing arousal through positive acts of intimacy.”

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For Better Results From Customer Service, Don’t Make It Personal

Study suggests words like ‘great’ and ‘fine’ also help
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Hilary Duff Says She Was ‘Too Young’ When She Got Married: ‘I Don’t Think We Were Mature Enough to Stick It Out’

“Looking back, do you think you were too young when you got married?”

That was the question audiences, and celebrity guest Hilary Duff, were asked on Friday’s episode of The Talk.

The Younger star, 29, didn’t hesitate in providing her response: “I do.”

“I was 22 when I got married. I’m now divorced, I have a 4-year-old — I wouldn’t change any of it for the world,” Duff admitted to the co-hosts.

Duff explained that in her early 20s, she had “so much so young” which made her “feel really ready to get married.” In August 2010, she married Mike Comrie — with whom she shares 4-year-old son Luca — but later divorced in February of this year.

“However, I don’t think we were mature enough to stick it out,” Duff revealed.

But although the actress thinks she was too young to get married at age 22, she is a believer that it does work for others who decide to get married at a younger age.

Co-host Sharon Osbourne also agreed, and suggested that every marriage is “case by case.”

“You can’t say blanket, ‘this is the way it should be,’ ” Osbourne said. “It’s on an individual basis. That’s the way it has to be.”

Just a month ago, Duff, who recently split with ex-boyfriend Jason Walsh, said that she doesn’t “feel the need” to tie the knot in the future.

“I don’t feel the need to get married again. As much as I was ready and excited, you’re like, ‘Oh, next step. We get married.’ That is the traditional person that I’m talking about that’s inside of me or however I was raised,” said the mother of one. “I don’t feel the need. I got to have the experience and it was awesome. I guess if it mattered to someone else that much, I would consider it.”


PEOPLE.com

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It’s OK If You Don’t Want To Be An Entrepreneur

Why do you really want to build a business?

  • To make your life more exciting?
  • To have more freedom?
  • To make more money?

You probably want more of everything! Great, because in addition to all of the above, business can also be:

  • more terrifying,
  • more depressing,
  • more exhilarating,
  • more mundane,
  • more lonely,
  • more aggravating,
  • more unsure,
  • more annoying,
  • more liberating,
  • more expensive,
  • more time-consuming,
  • more joyful,
  • more unpredictable,
  • more stupid
  • and, of course, more wonderful.

So it’s not that you won’t have fun starting a business. You will. A ton of fun.

But you’ll also go through a multitude of other emotions, states, feelings and stark realities, with that same fun mixed in randomly.

So now is the time to ask yourself: can you deal with all the elements of entrepreneurship, or are you just down for the fun stuff?

It’s ok if you really just want to experience the fun stuff that entrepreneurship has to offer.

I’m not judging. But I am pointing out that it’s simply not the way it is — and unfortunately, you don’t find out a lot of the other elements until you’re so deep in the game that it doesn’t make sense to quit. That’s why there’s so much talk about “hustle” and never quitting in the business space online — because so many entrepreneurs are too deep in the game to even consider turning around.

Once you’re a few years deep, it’s much harder to just “move on.” So you have to be extremely tough mentally in order to make it. That’s where the “hustle” mentality comes from. Not because entrepreneurs are some rare breed that don’t get tired — but because mental and emotional resilience is a learned trait that must be developed in order for us to survive.

I’m not trying to scare you. I’m just trying to share some things I wish people would have told me in the beginning.

People start businesses hoping that it will solve their biggest problems, all the while, forgetting that any new challenge — and make no mistake, running a real business is a huge challenge — will inevitably create new, previously unforeseen problems.

If you’re down for that, cool. If you’re not, just be honest with yourself. There’s no shame in getting a good job. Honestly.

For as much as I preach about building your own thing (and I do strongly believe in it) — I’d rather see you just be honest with yourself and do what’s actually going to make you happy, rather than trying to do something that isn’t “you” because looking at hundreds of pictures on Instagram every day has tricked you into thinking that you’re missing out on something.

Trust me, you’re not.

And let me assure you, there is nothing morally redeeming about being a business owner. A lot of the talk online equates having your own company with “giving back” or living your life “to the fullest” — as if there’s no other employment setting where this might be possible.

False.

Entrepreneurship doesn’t bestow or imply any moral or ethical benefits.

Having a business isn’t a necessarily better way of living, it’s just an other way of living.

And this is your life. Any decision that you make for yourself will be correct — as long as you’re honest about what you really want.

*******

I hope you enjoyed this article!

If you’re curious to know how I got started, and how you can begin your own journey to self- employment, you should enroll in my free mini-course on making more money. It’ll take you step-by-step through the process of creating a new business using skills you already have.

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GPS for the Soul – The Huffington Post
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Don’t Worry About the Vampire Diaries Christmas Cliffhanger, There’s Way More Crazy to Come

The Vampire Diaries, TVD, SterolineChristmases are always intense in Mystic Falls, and this year’s is no different. But it also happens to be the fall finale of the final season of The Vampire Diaries, which means everything…

E! Online (US) – TV News

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Kesha Opens Up About Her Mental Health So Others Don’t Feel Alone

Kesha is shedding light on her own mental health in order to comfort others who may be having the same experiences.

The singer recently opened up to Billboard magazine about dealing with psychological health conditions in the public eye. The conversation comes after a long legal entanglement with her former producer Lukasz “Dr. Luke” Gottwald, who she says committed sexual assault during their time working together. 

“I’ve battled a lot of things, including anxiety and depression,” Kesha told the publication. “Finding the strength to come forward about those things is not easy. But maybe, by telling my story, I can help someone else going through tough times.”

She also told Billboard that she’s working on new music that will “showcase my vulnerabilities as a strength and not as a weakness.”

Kesha’s candid attitude is necessary in a culture where stigma often puts people with mental illness in the shadows. Approximately one in five American adults will experience a mental health disorder in a given year. Yet many don’t seek proper medical treatment for fear of being judged or shamed. Celebrities can help remedy that through large-scale advocacy.

The singer has previously discussed her experience with disordered eating and other mental health issues. She said that it was only when she opened up to a therapist and got medical treatment was she able to begin to manage her condition.

“I realized being healthy is the most important thing I can do for myself,” Kesha told Vogue last year.

Couldn’t have said it any better.

H/T People

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Please Don’t Put Christmas Lights in Your Beard

Why does this sort of thing keep happening?

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Don’t Let the Election Distract You

2016-11-15-1479237925-6366170-f44251e0153e49aa81e0e24f72f835f9.jpg

Don’t let the election in the United States be a distraction. Two political parties each pursuing external power have produced a destructive and predictable consequence. The pursuit of external power – the ability to manipulate and control – is now counterproductive to our evolution. It is toxic. This means that attempting to change circumstances in any way with external power will not produce the world that we desire – a world of harmony, cooperation, sharing, and reverence for Life. It will only contribute more to the world of what the world is currently made of – fear.

The only remedy to fear is love. The only place where you can choose between the intention of love and the intention of fear is in yourself. This is the contribution that you can make. It may seem a small contribution, but that is from the perspective of the five senses. From a multi-sensory perspective it is the strongest and most powerful contribution that you can make to our common collective. It is the most powerful and constructive contribution that you can make to Life. And it is the contribution that you were born to make.

To create with love requires you to identify fear in yourself and challenge it by not acting on it and instead act from the most loving part of your personality that you can. The frightened parts of your personality are those that you experience as anger, jealousy, resentment, terror, depression, humiliation, happiness at getting what you want, etc. The loving parts of your personality are those that you experience as gratitude, appreciation, caring, and patience, among others.

From a five-sensory perspective, it may appear impossible to be grateful or appreciative of an occurrence that you do not want to happen. From a multi-sensory perspective, it is an opportunity to grow spiritually, and opportunities to grow spiritually are always being offered to us in the intimacy of our own experiences, no matter what is happening outside of us such as a 911 type event or a macro event such as the election of an American president that was created by the same energy, the energy of fear.

Now is the time to come to terms with the energy of fear in you, to use your courage to experience fear fully emotionally in terms of physical sensations in your body and to challenge it by choosing consciously to act with an intention of love. Look for what you can find to be grateful for in the world around you. See what you can find about yourself and change in yourself for the better. Create authentic power.

This is our opportunity. This is always our opportunity.

Everything else is a distraction.

Love, Gary

Gary Zukav
www.seatofthesoul.com

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GPS for the Soul – The Huffington Post
Special News Bulletin-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News

Many Heart Bypass Patients Don’t Take Needed Meds

Cardiologist says they need to understand surgery not a ‘cure’ for their disease
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SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN!-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News-
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You Don’t Have to Be Stoned to Appreciate This Video

Cool trick, bruh.

Lifestyle – Esquire

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PSA: Please Don’t Wear Bacon-Scented Underwear

The practical implications are terrifying.

Style – Esquire

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Why Mexicans Dont Drink Molson: Rescuing Canadian Business from the Suds of Global Obscurity

Why Mexicans Dont Drink Molson: Rescuing Canadian Business from the Suds of Global Obscurity


A scathing wake-up call castigating the timidity of Canadian companies in international markets, combining bracing analysis and compelling anecdotes with shrewd prescriptions for the future.
Canada has all the makings of a global leader, yet it has opted to become a laggard, frittering away its jackpot of rich resources rather than building viable multinationals that are ultimately the country''s best defence in a globalized world. Andrea Mandel-Campbell interviews some of Canada''s leading executives and behind-the-scenes movers and shakers to reveal the hidden challenges to Canada''s global success and the perils of continued complacency.
A lively and authoritative compendium of never-before-heard tales of Canadian companies abroad, Why Mexicans Don''t Drink Molson is also a hands-on guide for innovative competitiveness, helping readers to identify the nation''s previously underestimated assets and abilities.
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What You Don’t Know and Your Boss Won’t Tell You: Advice from Senior Female Executives on What You Need to Succeed

What You Don’t Know and Your Boss Won’t Tell You: Advice from Senior Female Executives on What You Need to Succeed


To move ahead in your career you need to be concerned about many issues that are not taught in school or the company handbook. What You Don’t Know and Your Boss Won’t Tell You covers a wide range of topics explored candidly by experienced female executives who learned how to navigate the unspoken and often debilitating rules of corporate life. This book will show you how to actively manage your career, communicate in the language of business, find leadership opportunities and good mentors, and develop a personal style that projects confidence and competence. The book also shows how you can handle the nuances of dating, emotions, and office politics, how to understand the rigors and rules of business travel, and ways to balance work and family comfortably. Unlike other books geared toward women on how to succeed in corporate life, What You Don’t Know and Your Boss Won’t Tell You offers specific advice from a group of successful female executives that will help empower women to take char
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French Women Don’t Get Fat (Unabridged)

French Women Don’t Get Fat (Unabridged)

The book we’ve all (certainly every woman between 25 and 75) been waiting for. Classy, chic, convincing, funny, wise, well-written and very timely. It’s the ultimate non-diet book, which nonetheless shows us how to eat with balance, control and above all pleasure.

Chuck out all the radical diet books, think about what you eat and why, and then enjoy eating the right things (and some of the wrong ones) intelligently, and in smaller portions. Eat, like a French woman, with your head not your stomach.

Guiliano, French-born and bred, gets the tone absolutely right. She succeeds in that rare high-wire act of being really serious about her subject but without taking herself too seriously; manages to encourage and inspire and amuse, without being bossy or earnest. This is a book that will make you laugh out loud and yet have you following several of her practical precepts within days – everyone who reads it becomes evangelical (French women don’t go to the gym, they climb the stairs-). It combines just the right balance of memoir, wisdom, wit, delicious recipes, and French common sense.

Guiliano emphasizes the virtues of freshness, variety, personal taste, enjoyment and, above all, portion control (research shows that dishes served in US restaurants are 25% larger than those served in restaurants in France!).

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Please Don’t Ask Me To Babysit Baby Calendar Print by CafePress

Please Don’t Ask Me To Babysit Baby Calendar Print by CafePress


Please Don’t Ask Me To Babysit – The Duchess and the Pig Baby – from Alice in Wonderland – available on T-shirts, buttons, mugs, pillows, clocks, banners, prints, stickers, cards and more Baby Calendar Print Don’t miss an important date ever again Our high quality one page wall calendars are printed on glossy, 12 point paper and measure 11 x 17. Full bleed dynamic color. Glossy, 12 point paper.
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Please Don’t Ask Me To Babysit Baby Calendar Print by CafePress

Please Don’t Ask Me To Babysit Baby Calendar Print by CafePress


Please Don’t Ask Me To Babysit – The Duchess and the Pig Baby – from Alice in Wonderland – available on T-shirts, buttons, mugs, pillows, clocks, banners, prints, stickers, cards and more Baby Calendar Print Don’t miss an important date ever again Our high quality one page wall calendars are printed on glossy, 12 point paper and measure 11 x 17. Full bleed dynamic color. Glossy, 12 point paper.
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Why Does My Husband Get Upset That I Don’t Orgasm?

Reader No O writes:

Hi. I was wondering if you can help me. I have loads of problems surrounding my marriage and here’s one of them. My husband doesn’t want to have sex with me anymore because I can’t orgasm. He also informed me that eventually if there’s no sex between us, he’ll seek it elsewhere. Which I don’t doubt he wouldn’t step out of the marriage. He has done so before for other reasons. I just feel it’s ridiculous to not have sex. I enjoyed having sex with him even though there’s no orgasm. There’s good feelings and also just being physically close is nice. Yes, it would be great to have one if it happens. It’s not very enjoyable being pressured to have one, however. Either way, he cares not that I still had enjoy the sex with getting to the big O. I don’t know what his real problem is. Why is it important to him? It’s not like he can feel what I feel.


IMG_20130703_213328_366 (1) nope

Dear NO,

I am torn between telling you that your husband sounds like a controlling and self-absorbed narcissist (you can read about them in any of these books) who needs extensive individual therapy, and using this platform to explain why women’s orgasms are so important to men.  Thankfully, those two options are not mutually exclusive.  Let’s first turn to your husband, and his relationship-destroying behaviors.

Your husband cheated on you in the past and is telling you that if he doesn’t have sex with you, he will look outside the marriage for sex elsewhere.  This is called emotional blackmail and you can read about it here: Emotional Blackmail: When the People in Your Life Use Fear, Obligation, and Guilt to Manipulate You.  Also in all those books I linked you to above.  The most absurd part of his ultimatum is that it is HIM who is refusing to have sex with you!  I really am angry on your behalf and sad that you are putting up with this level of emotional abuse, because that is exactly what this is.

I am sure that your husband is a troubled guy, who probably had a tough childhood in some respect or another, because apparently it turned him into a completely self-absorbed adult who is unable to see how his behavior is killing his relationship.  He is blaming you for something your body is unable to do and then threatening to have sex with other women, which is not an empty threat (and an empty threat would be bad enough, mind you) because he has been unfaithful before.  When you see it written out like that, does it not help you to see what a toxic situation this is?

Now if you just couldn’t orgasm, and you were with a loving and supportive partner, I would suggest the following strategies:

1. Try masturbation, with or without porn or erotic stories, to figure out if there is a way that you can get yourself to reach orgasm.

2. See a therapist with whom you can discuss possible deep seated issues surrounding sex, and, more broadly, how you deal with vulnerability and loss of control, which issues related to orgasm.

However, in the marriage you’re in currently, I do not think these strategies will do much.  I think it would be foolish to be vulnerable with your husband, because he is so obviously unsupportive and self-centered, and your inability to reach orgasm with him may be your body’s way of saying, “Danger! Don’t fully trust and open up to this guy!”  The mind-body connection is very real and important, particularly in regard to sexuality.

I urge you to get couples counseling and therapy of your own though, to deal with the following questions:

1. Why does your husband think that cutting you off from sex and threatening to seek it elsewhere is an appropriate response to this situation?

2. Why do you put up with this behavior from him?

You allude to other marital problems, and I am certain there are many.  Your husband needs to realize that he is acting in an emotionally abusive way, and hopefully a therapist can be of help in this regard.

Next, let’s turn to why women’s orgasms are so important to men:

1. It makes them feel like they are good in bed.

2. It is exciting to them sexually to watch and feel you orgasm.

3. It assuages any of their own insecurities about their penis size, performance, technique, etc., because obviously they are doing something right if you orgasm.

4. Think about if your husband never orgasmed.  Would you want to have sex as much?  I see couples with this issue in therapy, often when a man is on antidepressants which increase his time to orgasm dramatically and/or prevent him from ever reaching climax.  To many women, when a man can’t orgasm, over time, they begin to feel detached and uninterested during sex.

5. I mean, evolutionarily speaking, the point of sex is to climax.  The man’s orgasm obviously releases sperm but the female’s orgasmic contractions help to pull the sperm up where they can be more easily fertilized.  So men are wired to go for the gold, both for themselves and their partners.

6. You say it’s not like he can feel what you feel, but this isn’t strictly true.  Ideally, sexual partners are so attuned to one another that they can in fact basically feel what the other feels, which is why an orgasm in one partner may trigger one in the other, during intercourse or mutual masturbation.  Additionally, he would be able to physically feel orgasmic contractions in your vagina if you were to orgasm during sex.

7. In a loving relationship, people like to see their partner experience pleasure. It’s almost as good as feeling pleasure yourself, and sometimes even better. (However, I see why in this particular marriage you would find it difficult to understand why he would care if you experience orgasmic pleasure, because he doesn’t seem to care if you experience pleasure in other ways, such as by being spoken to with respect and kindness.)

8. Also, whenever one partner dismisses the other’s perspective and asks what the “real” problem is, this invariably lead to a bad dynamic.  By asking this, you are invalidating his perspective that you not having an orgasm IS his real problem.  It’s like if you told him to stop being a jerk and he said, “What’s your REAL problem though? Do you have PMS or something?”  Bad scene.

So, in a more loving and supportive marriage, I would expect your husband to be sad that you don’t orgasm, and to brainstorm ways that you could try to orgasm, and to want to research ways he could get you to orgasm, and all of that kind of problem-solving stuff that men love to do.  I mean, I empathize with a husband whose wife doesn’t orgasm, I really do.  I would have empathized with both of you in this situation, except that your husband is acting like a tremendous jerk (which I do not say often) by threatening you with infidelity and cutting you off from sex completely.  His behavior is NOT acceptable.  I hope that with a therapist, he can explore why he acts this way, and who is his early life likely treated him in the cold and mean way that he treats you.

And even if he doesn’t seek counseling for himself or agree to the couples counseling that you also need, I urge you to seek your own individual counseling because this type of blackmail and ultimatum-giving is just going to continue in other areas of the relationship, and you don’t deserve it.  You need to figure out why you’ve let it go on this long and how you can become someone who asserts herself and refuses to be treated with disrespect.

Good luck and thanks for writing in.  Till we meet again, I remain, The Blogapist Who Says Get Thee To A Couples Counselor and READ THOSE BOOKS.

This post was originally published here on Dr. Psych Mom. Follow Dr. Rodman on Dr. Psych Mom, Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest. Pre-order her book, How to Talk to Your Kids about Your Divorce: Healthy, Effective Communication Techniques for Your Changing Family.

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Working Women Don’t Have Wives: Professional Success in the 1990s

Working Women Don’t Have Wives: Professional Success in the 1990s


Terri Apter examines the pressure on working women as they try to balance marriage and childcare with the growing demands of the workplace. Analyzing the results of more than 100 interviews with working women, Apter shows how the myth of the "superwoman" masks the problems that real women must face.
List Price:
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College Kids Don’t Understand the HPV Threat

Survey found more than half didn’t get vaccinated, and many were unaware of their risk for infection
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SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN!-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News-
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Sometimes You Don’t Need a Planner

This blog probably seems odd to be written by a planner, but hear me out. Not everyone should hire a planner. That’s not to say that everyone doesn’t need a planner, but for those people that cannot get out of their own way, a planner might not be for you.

I admit to being an OCD control freak. It’s pretty much my way or no way at all. This is why I didn’t hire a planner. Short of cloning myself, there was no one that I was going to trust with the most important day of my life. And that’s OK. It’s OK to be psycho crazy about your wedding. If you’re normally all about the details and believe that if you want something done right, you better do it yourself, then a planner might not be for you.

Over the years I have run into these brides and grooms, the ones that think they know best and that no professional could possibly be the answer to their prayers. I end up working with these couples and wonder why they have hired me to plan their wedding day. They want what they want and, more importantly, are only willing to get what they want, their way.

There is no suggestion you can make, unless it coincides with their own, that they will deem acceptable. No matter how brilliant the idea is, the planner will be met with “Ok, what else you got?”

“What else I got?” Yes, this is a question I have received and it’s like, well, what else do you want?

That’s the whole joke too. These people want you to suggest everything, but nothing you suggest is ever going to be good enough. It’s like you’re supposed to be Madam Cleo and figure out what they want.

Planners are not mind readers. We can plan your day based on what you like and what you don’t like. But if you don’t help us out, then nothing we create is going to be what you want to see. Help us. Give us pictures. Share your thoughts and ideas. These things are helpful.

But back to the brides and grooms that just don’t want to hear anything we have to say. Why did you hire a planner? Seriously. Ask yourself that question. Because if you cannot come up with a legitimate answer, then you are wasting your money. I have worked with brides that would ask my opinion and if I said “black”, and they wanted to hear “white”, it was an issue. Then there always came the point where I said to my clients to do whatever they wanted to do. My opinion (I knew) meant nothing, and they really didn’t want me to do anything other than agree with them.

And here’s the thing, a good planner, is not going to agree with your bad ideas. Oh, you want to swoop in on a pterodactyl for your grand entrance and you want to know if I think your dress might get wrecked? But when I say “absolutely it will get wrecked, hello, pterodactyl!!!!” you get mad because that’s not what you wanted to hear.

You know why we don’t want you to make these tragic mistakes? Because we’ve seen everything. There are some of the most ridiculous warning labels out there like “don’t eat this” on silica gel. Well, duh, don’t eat it. Why do they have to say that? Because some idiot probably ate it. We are giving you warning labels because we have seen what can and will happen when stupid decisions are made. What happened when someone drank hot coffee that was marked “caution: hot”? She got burned, and then she sued.

Basically, we, as planners, don’t want you suing us or writing bad reviews because we let you do whatever you wanted. When we say that something is a bad idea, or make a suggestion, we aren’t trying to ruin your life and destroy your vision. We’re trying to make it so that your wedding is beautiful and you aren’t in tears because some prehistoric bird ate your gown.

Other things that aren’t helpful? “I went to a wedding and my friend only spent….”. STOP. Everyone lies about what they spend on a wedding. Some go higher, some lower, but without looking at the contracts, I don’t care if you’re besties with them and pinky swore to tell each other the cost of the weddings you’re planning. She is lying to you and you are lying to her. Liars. Both of you. Pants ablaze.

What you do not do, is you do not go back to your planner with this information. When a planner hears that so and so said it can be done for much less, you are basically telling the planner that they know nothing and need to look into this. I’ve done this for clients before and 100% of the time they’ve been wrong on the numbers. Basically, the result was that I wasted a bunch of time to say “I told you so”. It’s not worth it.

The moral of the story is that if you want to plan your own wedding, then plan your own wedding. No one is judging you, and you’re the only person that can figure out if you need a planner and will be able to work with one. Not everyone can work with a planner, and that’s OK too.

Just use the pterodactyl for your trash the dress session instead of your entrance. Ok?

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Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Health Tip: Don’t Use Food as a Reward

Here are suggested alternatives

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SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN!-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News-
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Going to a Wedding? Don’t Be That Guest

‘Tis the season for attending weddings! Are you going to a wedding (or five) this summer? You too can flawlessly navigate the unspoken rules of weddings and avoid any guest gaffes with these tips from real-life brides and grooms.

Couple Conundrum: Late or Missing RSVP’s
Recent bride and groom, Emma and Adam, had large extended families and a wedding venue with a small capacity, meaning they weren’t able to include some friends on their original guest list simply because of space. When a sizeable chunk of RSVP’s failed to arrive, they assumed those guests weren’t planning to attend and decided to extend invitations to those they didn’t quite have room for originally. Unfortunately, their assumption was incorrect. More responses than they bargained for eventually rolled in and affected guest counts — which ultimately affected their budget and caused some serious stress with venue capacity.

Pro Tip: RSVP on Time
Do the couple a favor and RSVP as quickly as possible, and certainly before the requested date. The RSVP card is one of the most important planning tools the couple has, but they need your cooperation for it to be effective. Show your enthusiasm and excitement for their big day by responding promptly. Texting doesn’t count! And don’t assume you have a plus one, unless the invitation specifically says so.

2015-05-22-1432314078-4953133-FlawlessFernsRSVP.jpg
Image courtesy of Wedding Paper Divas

Couple Conundrum: Duplicate Gifts
Last summer, brides-to-be Danielle and Stephanie spent weekend upon weekend meticulously curating their registries at various department stores, only to be gifted not one, but three of the same gift that wasn’t on their registry. After trying to return two of the three identical gifts, they discovered that the credit had been applied back to the gift-giver’s credit cards, much to their dismay…and embarrassment!

Pro Tip: Use the Registry
The registry is there for a reason. Stick with it to avoid putting the couple in a potentially awkward situation. If you can’t find the couple’s registry ask a member of the family or bridal party. There are exceptions, of course, like personal and meaningful gifts, gift cards and cash.

Couple Conundrum: Specific Dress Codes
When Becca was invited to an Indian wedding last year, she did her research on what to wear (at Indian weddings brighter is better!) and found a beautiful jewel-toned dress as opposed to something with a more neutral or conservative tone. She had an amazing time, felt beautiful and fit right in with the party. Three cheers for doing homework in advance!

Pro Tip: Do Your Homework
A wedding is not the place to flaunt your new avant-garde look! If you’re unsure of the dress code, use the season or the wedding venue as a cue. Be sure to do your research, too, in case there are any important cultural preferences you should be aware of. And if all else fails, just ask a bridesmaid! They can always give you the scoop.

2015-05-22-1432313675-2140585-posting.jpg
Image Courtesy of Martha Stewart Weddings

Couple Conundrum: Unwanted Social Sharing
Facebook and Instagram may be great ways to share life’s special moments, but be careful. In many cultures it’s considered bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding. Last fall one groom, John, unintentionally saw his bride, Juanita, before she walked down the aisle. One of Juanita’s bridesmaids had posted a photo of her getting ready on Instagram before the wedding had begun!

Pro Tip: Post with Caution While the overzealous bridesmaid certainly didn’t mean any harm, it’s a good lesson for us all. Be mindful with social media — especially at weddings — as posts can have unintended but serious consequences. Even though it’s tempting to post throughout the event, remember it’s the couple’s special day, so look for any guidelines. If you don’t see any instructions, just follow the couple’s lead!

Regardless of the situation, you can be sure that you don’t want to be that guest! You know the one. Avoid anything that makes you the center of attention. It’s never fun to have regrets the next morning. Pace yourself with the bubbly, participate in the activities, dance your heart out and have a blast celebrating. Just be sure to keep yourself in check. Soak in every moment of this special day and show your support for the newlyweds!

Watch the Small talk. Big day. wedding guest etiquette video for more tips.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Weddings – The Huffington Post
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At Met Gala, ‘HONY’ Photographer Shoots Pics Of Catering Staff And Others Who Don’t Get A Spotlight

Brandon Stanton, the photographer behind the immensely popular Humans of New York site, has a special talent for getting strangers to open up to him. And while he usually prefers to shoot and interview ordinary people he encounters on the streets of the city — so far, he’s photographed more than 5,000 New Yorkers — last night, he focused his lens on one of the most extraordinary events in Manhattan: the Met Gala. Unsurprisingly, while there was no shortage of star power at the ball, Stanton’s interest remained in those whose faces and names you don’t know off the top of your head.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Style – The Huffington Post
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Want a Great Relationship? Don’t Go to Bed Angry

The first time I got married, I was young, naïve and foolish. I didn’t genuinely understand what it meant to share a life with another person even though I was absolutely convinced I did. I also wanted to do my marriage differently than what I’d seen my parents do.

I’d witnessed the hostility, frustration and dysfunction first hand. Instead, I wanted a healthy, loving relationship. But because my mom, dad and stepdad were my role models, I ended up re-enacting what I’d experienced even when it was the last thing I’d planned.

Meanwhile, my heart craved something else entirely, something other than what I was creating. It longed for intimacy, love, connection, to feel understood. These sounded romantic and simple but eluded me.

What I had and what I wanted were miles apart only I pretended that wasn’t the case and acted as if everything was perfect. Until it all came apart.

Looking back I see that the main challenge, the thing that successfully unraveled my relationship, wasn’t one singular event. It was the opposite. It was the small, every day, ordinary moments that poked the holes.

What am I talking about?

Here’s a scenario:

It’s a Friday night and we’re watching a movie, one of those heart wrenching, soul mate tearjerkers. Naturally, I start crying. My husband rolls his eyes and snorts, implying that I’m pathetic.

I instantly feel hurt and reject him back, turning away from him in bed, holding my wounded-ness like a cloak around me.

I could have told him how I felt. Instead, I justified my silence with thoughts like: He doesn’t understand or care. Rationalizations that were probably untrue but re-enforced my pain and hurt.

These moments seemed trite and inconsequential when they occurred but added up over time, they eroded trust until one day, a decade later, I looked up and realized I was standing on the opposite bank of an emotional gulf from my partner.

How did that happen?

From all the little hurts — me nagging about the laundry, him disappointing me by working Saturdays, me criticizing him about a monthly gym membership he’d never use, him not getting me a card for my birthday… and on and on. We didn’t talk about these little upsets and chose to go to bed feeling hurt and angry.

Needless to say, our relationship splintered and I decided that I was done. Done with power and control masquerading as love. No more partners.

Instead, I’d take care of myself and my girls. I wasn’t ready for another relationship and I certainly didn’t want one that wasn’t really about love.

It was time for me to learn how to be loving which began with me learning how to love myself. I also had to understand how to make room for other people and that meant surrendering my need for control. And most importantly, giving up criticism.

It took awhile and frankly, I was skeptical that real love even existed.

Then I got surprised. Love came to me, as it usually does, when I least expected it.

This time my partner and I agreed to do things differently. Consequently, he and I talk about everything. We’re open about our feelings and even about how we want to be with each other. This led us to creating agreements that govern our relationship.

One of these is to not go to bed angry. I’ll admit that sometimes this is really hard to do. Especially when I feel hurt or wronged.

In those moments it’s hard to be emotionally vulnerable. It’s much easier to fall into blame or feel like a victim. But I value what we have together and I remember how going to bed angry whittled away my previous relationship.

I know it’s worth speaking up because then those little things won’t accumulate. They won’t slowly push me away emotionally so I stop opening up and sharing.

Instead, when I do finally speak my words of upset, those words of truth, the opposite occurs.

I feel even more seen, heard and loved. I am honored and taken care of because I choose to share my vulnerability instead of holding in the hurt.

It’s been 11 years and I can honestly say that my current husband and I are even closer today than we were all those years ago. A big reason why is because we consistently try to honor this agreement and not go to bed angry.

So the next time you feel hurt, disappointed or upset with your partner, try talking about it.

Tell him or her how you feel. See if your partner can understand your point of view and perhaps offer some insight into theirs. It may bring you to a new level of intimacy with one another and deepen the bond you have.

Shakti Sutriasa is the Founder of DecideDifferently.com, a personal development company offering life coaching, counseling and workshops. Her unique approach combines modern psychology and spirituality to support people seeking positive change and self-transformation. Shakti is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, and has an MA in Education. Learn more at DecideDifferently.com

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Weddings – The Huffington Post
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When It Comes To Feminism And Reproductive Rights, Survey Says Labels Don’t Work

New research from Vox revealed that while a very small percentage of Americans identify as feminists, the majority still believe in gender equality.

The survey included 1,067 participants from across the U.S. and covered topics including gender equality, LGBT issues and abortion. Twenty-one percent of participants were between 18 and 29 years old, 25 percent were between 30 and 44 years old, 27 percent were between 45 and 59 years old and 27 percent were over 60 years old. About half the participants identified as female and half as male.

Vox found that only 18 percent of Americans consider themselves feminists. Fifty-two percent of survey participants said that they didn’t consider themselves feminists, 26 percent were “unsure” and 4 percent refused to answer the question.

With so few people identifying as feminists, you’d think most Americans wouldn’t support gender equality. Wrong. Vox found that a whopping 85 percent of participants responded that they do “believe in equality for women.” And 76 percent of participants believe there is still work to be done when it comes to “equality for women in work, life and politics.”

While the majority of Americans don’t choose to identify as feminists, they support the ideals of feminism. In the great words of Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: “Feminism is the social, political and economic equality of the sexes.” It’s really that simple.

The survey found that Americans are equally as confused about where they stand on abortion as feminism. When asked about abortion, only 28 percent of participants agreed with the statement: “Abortion should be legal in almost all cases.”

However, when the survey question incorporated women, the results changed. When people were asked if “women should have a legal right to safe and accessible abortion in almost all cases,” 37 percent said yes.

“That’s a jump of nine percentage points in who thinks abortion ought to be generally legal, just by highlighting the fact that a woman is involved in the situation,” Vox’s Sarah Kliff wrote.

These results indicate just how complicated Americans’ feelings about reproductive rights are. “The public has diverse views on abortion. But it’s rarely a split between ‘abortion is right’ and ‘abortion is wrong,'” Kliff wrote. “Instead, there is a nuance that the public conversation typically misses: a factoring in of personal circumstances and beliefs that manifest themselves in deeply held individual views.”

While many people shy away from labels when it comes to women’s issues, it seems that most agree with the idea behind them: Women should have the same social, political and economic rights as men.

Head over to Vox to read the rest of the research.

— This feed and its contents are the property of The Huffington Post, and use is subject to our terms. It may be used for personal consumption, but may not be distributed on a website.

Comedy – The Huffington Post
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What You’ll Never Fix About Your Marriage (and Why You Don’t Have to)

I planned to tell my now-husband that it wasn’t going to work out on our third date. He was very sweet, respectful and handsome but my internal voice suggested we weren’t compatible enough.

He was in sales; I was studying to be a therapist. We had different views on religion. With his short hair and clean-shaven face he was more clean-cut than my previous boyfriends. And our first kiss had just been so-so. I had my doubts about where this might go.

On that date, however, as we shot pool and munched peanuts I ended up having such a great time that I decided to give him a chance, and that evening the kiss was delicious.

Over twelve years of marriage and parenting, our differences have, at times, been the source of conflict. But what I’ve learned to hold onto is that, it’s the doubt, judgment and criticism of our differences, that are toxic — not the number of ways we differ.

Of course, we all want to share some fundamental things — and to have a successful relationship we’ve got to have the basics — safety, love, trust and commitment. But compatibility is more about the ways we draw on one another’s strengths to build a whole that is greater than the sum of its parts.

More than, “Do we have enough in common?” or “Can he finish my sentences?” I think the important question is: “Am I open and willing to work towards finding the gifts in our similarities and differences?”

There are red flag issues like abuse or dishonesty, and then there’s the other stuff: I’m outdoorsy and he’s not, I’m neat and he’s messy, I’m a meat-eater and he’s vegetarian. These differences aren’t deal-breakers. In fact, our fixation on the ways that our husband is “too different” from us is the actual thing that keeps us from being compatible.

But what do we do when we find ourselves focusing on, and judging our marriage, for the qualities we don’t share?

Here are some tips for nurturing true compatibility:

  • Watch out for unrealistic expectations. Soul mates can be found, but more often they are co-created.
  • Pay attention to your focus. We invest our energy where we choose to focus. Choose gratitude instead of criticism as often as possible.
  • Cut your circular thinking. Train your mind instead of having it rule you. Practices like meditation are invaluable for this skill.
  • Choose curiosity over criticalness. What are the differences about? What do they add to the relationship? (Embrace those things.)
  • Get into your body: breathe, stretch, notice. Criticism is often more about fear than about true incompatibility.

Twelve years later, my husband and I are going strong with 2 kids, 2 dogs, 5 chickens and a guinea pig. Our differences have, at times, been the source of conflict, but in working through that conflict our love and commitment have grown.
Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Don’t Sweat the Sweat Stuff

So Eva Mendes set the intertubes ablaze a few days back in an interview with Extra when she said: “You can’t do sweatpants… ladies, number one cause of divorce in America, sweatpants, no!”

The implication: Keeping boyfriend (and father of her newborn) Ryan Gosling happy means avoiding the elasticized waistband.

Further implication: The elasticized waistband suggests an added need for comfort.

Further further implication: The added need for comfort suggests the behavior that an entire generation of women used to refer to as “letting yourself go.”

And finally: that said “letting yourself go” is the presumably Hershey’s-syrup-written handwriting on the wall.

A few things to point out:

1. Eva Mendes has a sense of humor. If you didn’t get this from the actual interview clip, you can get it from the fact that she went on to post on Instagram: “Dear favorite pair of sweatpants. I was just kidding when I said you’re the #1 cause of divorce. Everyone knows that orange crocs are the #1 cause of divorce. Either way it was a bad joke and I feel terrible if you or anyone thought I was serious. Thanks for understanding sweatpants. Sorry orange crocs.”

2015-03-21-1426953108-3492853-sweatpants.jpg

Pair of pants and method for donning and removing a pair of pants: US Patent 8667615 B2

2. Many of the people responding to her original statement do not seem to have a sense of humor. Cases in point — Facebook comment 1: “I hope I never feel the need to wear makeup and nice clothes 24/7 to keep my significant other happy.” Facebook comment 2: “Yet, she still can’t get Gosling to marry her. She’s so full of herself it’s gagging.” Furthermore, so you know it’s serious, Fox News brought in not one, not two, but three talking heads to take on the issue.

3. Yes, the notion that women need to stay physically attractive to men in order to “keep them” is an outdated, sexist trope, perhaps put most succinctly by the 1963 Hal David lyric: “Hey, little girl, comb your hair, fix your make-up, soon he will open the door. Don’t think because there’s a ring on your finger, you needn’t try anymore.”

4. YET. There is something to be said for not taking a spouse’s interest for granted. Keeping the sexual spark alive is crucial to longevity in a relationship — perhaps especially in a marriage — but it doesn’t just depend on looks, and it isn’t just a one-way street.

While the pages of history and fiction are disproportionately filled with admonitions to women, men received plenty of warnings, too. In 1913, a British author named Blanche Ebbutt wrote in her book Don’ts for Husbands: “Don’t sit down to breakfast in your shirt-sleeves in hot weather on the ground that ‘only your wife’ is present. She is a woman like any other woman. The courtesies you give to womankind are her due, and she will appreciate them.”

Three years later, in his book How to Love, Walter Gallichan wrote: “There is no hope for widespread married happiness till men learn that love is the art of understanding and pleasing women… After marriage it is the husband’s part to show his aptitude in arousing and maintaining the responsiveness of the wife.”

And even the humorist Ogden Nash got semi-serious in a 1935 poem he wrote to a friend about to marry:

“If you desire a noisy nursery
And a golden wedding anniversary,
Scan first the bog where thousands falter:
They think the wooing ends at the altar.”

In 2015, women shouldn’t be held to a higher standard than men in keeping themselves attractive; they should, naturally, be valued for more than their appearance; and should of course be encouraged to wear whatever makes them comfortable. On the other hand, in 2015, all people in their rightful convictions might strive to be just a little more flexible — as flexible, say, as an elastic waistband.
Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Yale President Peter Salovey: ‘The Most Effective Way To Combat Speech You Don’t Like Is With Speech’

Yale President Peter Salovey spoke on free expression on campuses, reflecting on a recent incident at the University of California, Berkeley, where students protested comedian Bill Maher’s appearance at a graduation ceremony because of controversial comments he made about Muslims.

“It’s very difficult. You see this controversy playing out on many different campuses over the last couple of years,” Salovey said.

Salovey said he thinks people want to live in an environment where others are respectful and civil, but being offended can be a learning experience.

“It’s fine to protest, it’s fine to raise one’s own voice,” Salovey said. “The most effective way to combat speech you don’t like is with speech.”

Below, live updates from the 2015 Davos Annual Meeting:

Comedy – The Huffington Post
ENTERTAINMENT NEWS-Visit Mobile Playboy today for the hottest adult entertainment online!

Cancer Doctors Don’t Discuss Herbs, Supplements With Patients

Many physicians cite a lack of knowledge as a primary reason, survey finds
healthfinder.gov Daily News
SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN!-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News-
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Planning a Honeymoon? Don’t Miss These 6 Tips!

Some days I wish I could go back and plan our wedding all over again. Just kidding, I would never wish for that, but what I DO wish I could do is plan our honeymoon all over again. We were less than thrilled with Costa Rica (you can’t win them all!), but you can’t go wrong using any of the below tips.
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(Sometimes I do re-live our honeymoon just to look at my smoking hot husband. #realtalk)

Planning a honeymoon? Here is some of my best advice!

1. Don’t use a travel agent. They are getting commission off the packages they sell to you, so they’re going to guide you toward the packages where they receive the highest revenue. I would do the same thing! What I’m saying is–only you know what you will like. The reality is that the majority of these travel agents have never been to the resorts and destinations they’re selling you on. Before our honeymoon, we had always booked trips ourselves and figured we would take a chance since we had heard great things regarding travel agents making THE BEST arrangements. Never again, lesson learned.

2. If you’re going to a tropical, all-inclusive type of place, you will live in your swimsuit, so pack accordingly. I got this advice before we went on ours and made sure I had a different bathing suit for everyday, as well as a new cover-up. It helps later when you’re trying to differentiate days via photos

3. If you have any sort of food allergies, pack things like granola bars, that you know you’ll be able to eat in a pinch. My husband verified with our resort that I would have plenty to eat with a gluten allergy, but when we got there it was a totally different story. Being sick for eight days on your honeymoon IS NOT fun. Thankfully, I always keep at least one box of KIND bars in my suitcase when I travel.

4. Use your days to unwind and completely unplug. I know, I know. You want to look at all your wedding photos, check in on Facebook & Instagram and make sure your email inbox hasn’t imploded. I did, too! Save it for the evenings when your significant other is grabbing a shower or you have some downtime before dinner. Spend your daytime simply taking in your time off!

5. This one seems obvious, but I was completely aloof. For international travel regardless of if the resort says you will not need it, bring a converter. So many of our plug-in items (hairdryer, toothbrush, razor, etc.) completely failed on us mid-trip because we weren’t able to charge them! The items we were able to charge made this horrendous buzzing noise that led me to believe they would explode at any given moment. Just pack that darn converter.

6. Again for international travel, make sure your passport is up to date! One thing that didn’t happen to me, but happened to a friend is in regards to passports and name changing. If you plan on taking a later honeymoon and have changed your name officially, make sure your passport matches the name on the ticket! They will 100 percent not let you on the plane otherwise. YIKES!

What honeymoon tips do you have for engaged couples?
Weddings – The Huffington Post
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Study Finds Hospital Patients Don’t Wash Their Hands Enough

More education needed about importance of infection control, researcher says
healthfinder.gov Daily News
SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN!-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News-
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Samsung Makes Butt Robot With Mom Jeans To Prove Its Phones Don’t Bend

It sounds too good to be true, but it’s not: Samsung has created a big, robotic, mom jean-wearing butt to prove its phone doesn’t bend when a person sits on it.

You know, unlike some of its more prominent competitors.

A video posted to Samsung’s official blog Thursday shows the company’s Galaxy Note 4 phone subjected to a number of tests. But the most important question of all is clear: Can a Samsung phone withstand a giant butt sitting on it a couple hundred times?

Samsung could have used a regular old human for the test, or a boring robot. Instead, it created this robotic-powered rump. To warm up, the phone was subjected to your standard “tap it back” style sit down.

As you can see, so far so good. But could the Samsung withstand a full-on Miley Cyrus powered twerking session?

OK, so maybe it’s not quite that fast in the video. Still, we’re pretty impressed.

Watch the full video, appropriately titled “Samsung Galaxy Note 4 Endures the Gluteus Maximus,” below to see more of Samsung’s test:

(H/T: The Verge)

Comedy – The Huffington Post
ENTERTAINMENT NEWS-Visit Mobile Playboy today for the hottest adult entertainment online!

Why Women Don’t Watch Porn

I recently went on a recommended website to watch some porn in the name of, uh, research. I’ve never really watched it before and was intrigued after watching Don Jon, a film comparing the male fantasy of porn versus the female fantasy of chick flicks. After my research session, it is now extremely clear to me why a larger female demographic does not watch porn — and it doesn’t have anything to do with sex drive or any of those sexist assumptions. It is purely because porn, in the current state, is terrible! These were the thoughts and concerns I had while watching one episode in a massage salon.

The clip starts off with a worker (what kind of work? No one knows. No tool belt, no paint buckets. Nothing.) coming out of the back room saying that he’s done and the masseuse pulls a $ 100 bill out of her boobs and asks if instead of the $ 100, she can trade him a massage. Oh, honey, you poor girl. Do you really think you’re only worth $ 100? At the very least, negotiate in a warranty where maybe you can trade a blow job for any follow up work needed! And what kind of business is he running where the paper work just disappears and his boss doesn’t ask for the payment? I think that’s called tax evasion!

But okay, he accepts. They seductively walk to the back room where there is a shower and a bathtub. I haven’t been to that many spas or massages in my life, but I have never been to one with a shower on one side and then a bathtub in the middle of the room. What is this?! They undress and get into the shower. What’s most impressive in this scene is that between the shower and the tub and giving this guy a blow job, her hair and face do not get wet. Not even once. Her make-up stays in tack! How?! I have tried many times to be lazy and not wash my hair in the shower and instead, just tie it and wear it up, but somehow, without fail, it always gets wet. This girl has some serious skills. And no, she doesn’t accidentally snort water up her nose while going down on him either. Wow, I am impressed. My other question is, shower first, then bathtub? Wouldn’t you want to get soapy in the bathtub and then rinse off in the shower? But, I digress.

So, they finally get to the “massage” portion and here comes the most ridiculous part. They get down on… an AIR MATTRESS. I’m sorry, but whaaat? Porn plot aside, I moved into NYC after graduation with no money and was able to buy a brand new mattress for $ 150 including shipping. You’re telling me that this porn production company was not able to put together $ 150 for a real mattress? Come on. And back to the plot, what massage parlor, no matter how low class, uses an air mattress? And I know you’re thinking, “It’s porn — it’s not realistic.” But the thing is, when they started to get into it, every single thrust resulted in an annoying squeak squeak squeak from the plastic friction. How is anybody supposed to get into sexy mode with that noise going on? After a while, it’s like the guy sitting next to you in Starbucks tapping his pen on the table. All you can do is focus on that noise and it takes all of your self-control to not lunge at him and break his pencil in half or in this case, I wanted to jump into the scene and pop that air mattress!

Back to the plot, the girl is giving a full-body massage, as in she is using her full body to massage a rather minimal portion of his body. That doesn’t seem very efficient. And while she is running her whole body along his back, she makes a confused face and says, “Well, that wasn’t supposed to happen.” Oops, a penis fell into her vagina, but hey, that’s normal and let’s just keep going. I wish for education’s sake and for setting slightly more realistic expectations for both men and women and just for everybody’s general safety that they would use condoms in porn. I mean, does she know this “worker?” Does he trust this “masseuse” who might sleep with every guy in exchange for $ 100 worth of labor? How is it that neither of them is worried about STDs?

How does this story end? I’m honestly not sure because I got so bored that I kept trying to fast forward and then was not patient enough to wait for the 10-second buffering time, but considering it’s porn, I can pretty much tell you that it ended up with them coming at the same time (and again, leading men to believe that women can come on their schedule vaginally because, sure, that’s realistic) and her moaning in satisfaction in a very fake high pitched voice.

So, dear porn industry, I can tell you now that that turns on no woman (although it gave me many giggles) and considering how saturated the current industry is now, there is a HUGE opportunity to capture the other half of the population, aka women. This is what the ideal porn would be like for me (and I assume a large proportion of the female audience.)

The scene can start in any scenario, but not something cheesy like a massage parlor; it has to be slightly realistic. Let’s just say they meet at a friend of a friend’s party. The very tall, dark, and handsome man walks in wearing a perfectly tailored suit and crisp white shirt with a stiff collar. He works some white collar job — maybe an investment banker, possibly a lawyer, but not a sleazy “he’s going to Hell” type that just steals money from people, but maybe an environmental lawyer or human rights lawyer who is doing good in the world. He relays all this information to the woman while he smoothly gets hers another drink, but without being a show-off. Some chit chat happens and they end up at his apartment, which has an amazing view of the city skyline, of course.

He puts on some music and they dance a little bit and he loses his perfectly wrinkle-free suit jacket and rolls up his white shirt sleeves to subtly show off his biceps. Okay, at this point you’re rolling your eyes saying that girls want romance, not sex. But here’s the thing, WE DO. Or at least in the porn and sex version, foreplay. We need to be warmed up and not just do the, in a very crass way of putting it, “hump and dump.” I feel for most woman out there, a good 20 minutes of foreplay is the very least we need before anything even enters us, which is where the porn industry, and pretty much all men, are getting it wrong. The majority of the clips I found online were just that, clips that lasted anywhere from 5 to 25 minutes, with only a few going over the half hour mark. How am I supposed to get in the mood and be comfortable with foreign specimen entering me in under ten minutes?

What I really want is a guy to tell me that he wants to hold me for a little bit because he understands that I’m bloated from that lovely dinner he just treated me to and knows that I am conscious of my food baby stomach after eating a three-course meal because of course I polished off my whole plate of chocolate cake, and if he was a gentleman, a bite, or half, of his dessert as well. And so he understands that I just want to cuddle for now and even when we have sex later, I don’t want his hands running over my self-conscious tummy and would prefer positions where he can’t even see it because that’s what I need to feel sexy and for my pleasure. Thanks.

I’ll be the first to admit, no one will ever produce porn like this, but as I watched the Fifty Shades of Grey trailer this week, I had to wonder, “Why can’t we produce porn that’s more in line with this?” Not the BDSM aspect, but with some quality and actually good looking people? I clicked on a clip for fetishes with stockings and the girl was in a poofy costume looking longingly out the window while leaning on a piano with cheesy music playing in the background. I understand that La Perla or Agent Provocateur may be a bit out of a porn film’s budget, but even $ 30 lingerie from Victoria’s Secret would have looked better than that. At one point, I was distracted when the girl was touching herself because of her fake acrylic nails. Who still even gets acrylic French manicures? It’s called shellac gel, honey. Get on that – your nails looks as cheap as you are. Considering I ended up getting a great ab workout laughing from my little “research session,” I’ll just have to hope for a Magic Mike and Fifty Shades of Grey crossover coming sometime in the near future. Until then, I don’t think I can ever get a massage again for fear of getting a fit of giggles in the middle.

(On a different note, I forgot to go on an incognito window to access this website and now I keep getting penis enlargement spam emails. Are these two incidents related? Oops, rookie mistake.)
Style – The Huffington Post
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Don’t Let Kids Drink Pool Water

Expert offers tips for spotting chlorine poisoning, bacterial infection, secondary drowning in kids
healthfinder.gov Daily News
SPECIAL NEWS BULLETIN!-http://www.acrx.org -As millions of Americans strive to deal with the economic downturn,loss of jobs,foreclosures,high cost of gas,and the rising cost of prescription drug cost. Charles Myrick ,the President of American Consultants Rx, announced the re-release of the American Consultants Rx community service project which consist of millions of free discount prescription cards being donated to thousands of not for profits,hospitals,schools,churches,etc. in an effort to assist the uninsured,under insured,and seniors deal with the high cost of prescription drugs.-American Consultants Rx -Pharmacy Discount Network News-
HEALTH SPECIALS!!-

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